


Never Have I Ever....

by CumberRachel



Series: Avengers Fan Fiction Collection [10]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Asgardian Liquor, Bathroom Control, Birthday, Birthday Party, Birthday Presents, Birthday Sex, Blow Jobs, Bottom Bucky Barnes, Bottom Steve Rogers, Bucky Barnes & Sam Wilson Friendship, Bucky Barnes's Metal Arm, Cute, Dom Bucky Barnes, Dom/sub Undertones, Drinking Games, Drunk Steve Rogers, Established Relationship, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fluff, Happy Ending, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Kinda, Light Dom/sub, M/M, Mentions of Rape, Multiple Orgasms, Never Have I Ever, Nothing explicit, Orgasm Control, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Orgasm Denial, Pool Sex, Protective Bucky Barnes, Rape is a past event by a stranger, Sam Wilson Is a Good Bro, Sex Toys, Sex Toys Under Clothing, Sexual Humor, Sparring, Spooning, Steve Rogers Feels, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, Sub Steve Rogers, Swimming Pools, Therapist Sam Wilson, Thor can be a little shit sometimes, Top Bucky Barnes, Top Steve Rogers, Vibrators, accidental saddness, big spoon Bucky, inconstistant POV, it was great, it's as a memory, little spoon steve, lots of fluff, mentions of fisting, mild use of homophobic language, mostly recovered Bucky Barnes, not between characters, onlyabout 3 times, poor steve, probably the fluffiest thing ive ever written, shameless fluff, stucly lookalikes too, theres a porn gif that inspired part of this fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-23
Updated: 2015-07-19
Packaged: 2018-04-05 19:15:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 6
Words: 21,049
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4191741
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CumberRachel/pseuds/CumberRachel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony Stark, genius, billionaire, reformed playboy, philanthropist. 99% of the time his ideas are brilliant! Fantastic!! Stupendous!! But the other 1% of the time his ideas start out good and end very, very badly indeed. For instance, when he suggests the team play 'Never have I ever' (now with the ability to get Steve drunk, thanks to Thor) and no once expects what gets revealed by the Good Captain.</p><p>Just to mention, in the third and fourth chapters there is a mention of rape, there is nothing explicitly described but it is hinted at in the third and then there is a nightmare and talking about it in the fourth. If this is triggering for you  then skip the sections with ******* above and below it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Why Don't We Play...?

**Author's Note:**

> Been a while since I've written anything. This will be hopefully 3 chapters, maybe only 2, idk yet. recently got some very positive feedback that inspired me to write some more, chances are there will be more than one upload this week

"Has anybody introduced Rogers to drinking games yet?" 

Steve looked up from his sketchbook and frowned at Tony. "Drinking games existed in the 40's Tony..." He pointed out, glancing round at the other avengers. It was movie night and the current film (Sherlock Holmes: A Game Of Shadows) had just finished. Steve hadn't really been in the mood for a movie but if he didn't turn up then not only would Natasha drag him kicking and screaming, but Bucky would help. So he went along anyway to be less inconvenient. 

 

Unfortunately, Steve realised that Stark's comment may not have been a random though, but a calculated and planned manoeuvre. At least if Bruce's warning face was anything to go by. 

 

"Tony, do you think your maybe forgetting what we spoke about the other day?" Bruce hinted, not very subtlety. Planned manoeuvre it was then. 

 

"Oh c'mon Brucey Bear. Don't spoil my fun. I'm sure there are plenty of new games we can introduce the good captain to. I'm guessing 'spin the bottle' and 'truth or dare' existed right?" He asked rhetorically, directing his attention back to Steve. The blonde nodded with vague interest, not exactly worrying about what would happen considering he couldn't get drunk.

 

"So, I was thinking.... 'Never have I ever...' We are all adults who live very dangerous lives. You all know my lifestyle and I'm in the mood to get drunk. It will also give us some much needed insight into cap's night time activities. What d'you say guys? Who's in?" Tony stood to fetch multiple bottles of alcohol from his stash present in every floor. 

 

Steve sighed and looked at Natasha, he didn't really want to do this. He didn't know how the game worked though, so inevitably he was intrigued. She was watching him with curiosity, like she too was wandering what Steve did after hours. Subtly, Nat raised her eyebrows in question, checking if he would be okay with it. Steve would forever be grateful for Natasha since waking up, he wouldn't know what to do if she left. It was her curiosity that clinched it, he couldn't say no to her.

 

"Alright, I'm in. But you're forgetting that I can't get drunk." He reminded them, a tiny part hoping that they would decide 'yeah, never mind then.' But no, all hail to Thor who jumped up and clapped his hands.

 

"Fear not, Steven! I have brought more Asgardian liquor for us to drink. From what I remember you became very merry upon drinking this." He grinned wide and winked at a glaring Steve. Okay, so apparently Thor knew exactly what this game was. Steve was so screwed. He heard Tony and Sam cheer at Thor's revelation. This was gonna be a long night, he really wished Bucky were here.

 

"Don't worry Cap. I don't think you'll get that drunk with 'never have I ever...'" Clint drawled, clearing crap from the coffee table and setting the coasters in a circle. Steve just rolled his eyes, he had no idea what he was getting into. 

 

Bruce, Sam, Clint and Nat all got in place on the floor in front of a coaster so Steve copied, glancing around a little anxiously. 

 

"Steve, you don't have to if you don't want to, we won't force you." Bruce said kindly, ever the level headed voice of reason. Sometimes Steve wandered how he and the hulk were the same man. Steve shook his head, though, he said he'd play so he will.

 

* * *

 

"Right, the game-" Tony started. Everyone was sat around the small coffee table behind a shot glass. Thor and Steve's with his 'Asgardian Liquor' and everyone else with vodka, (not the Russian variety Natasha usually drinks though). Steve really hoped Bucky was having a good enough day to be able to handle him drunk.

 

"- we go round each person and begin with 'Never have I ever'. Then you follow with something you've never, ever, done. If you have done said something then you take your shot and get a re-fill. If no one drinks then the person giving that statement drinks. JARVIS will keep tabs on how many shots each person has drunk. And by... Shall we say 3 hours? The person who has drunk the least wins. And probably leads a very boring lifestyle but there we go. Everyone understand?" Tony looks around, gunning at all the nods and 'yes' of approval. "Great! Sam, you start."

 

Sam thought for a moment, a smirk forming on his face. "Start nice and easy, ease Rogers in. Never have I ever needed glasses." He turned to Bruce and Tony who rolled their eyes and necked their shots, quickly filling them. What shocked everyone was that Natasha also picked up her drink and threw it down her throat. 

 

"Really Nat? You wore glasses? When? Why don't I know about this?" Clint cried, almost horrified at his lack of knowledge.

 

"When I was a kid, I got laser eye surgery in the red room." She explained, a little embarrassed. Steve squeezed where he held her ankle, supporting her.

 

"Alright, fair enough." Clint relented, smiling softly at her. "My go. Never have I Ever used a sword, I kinda want to though." He mused. Thor was the only one to drink this time, until Steve remembered something. 

 

"Do toy swords count?" He asked. Clint thought about it and then nodded. This time Sam, Steve and Bruce drank.

 

"What?" Bruce mumbled, "we were all children once. Anyway. Never have I ever... Been skinny dipping." Bruce began to play with his hands and Steve realised that maybe it was him who didn't want to be here. But rules were rules, so he drank. As did everyone else. 

 

"Okay, enough with easing in gently. We all know what this games really for." Tony grinned devilishly and Steve's face fell, he should have known this was all about sex. Steve also saw Bruce's face fall in a similar way, he wished he could give him a subtle way out so as not to embarrass him anymore. But then, as if he had someone looking down on him, he received a text. 

 

"Sorry guys, I'm gonna have to be a party pooper. My experiments done." He drank what was in his glass and promptly left. Steve only just caught Nat seeking her phone away with a secret smile.

 

"Oh well, more booze for us. So, never have I ever taken someone's virginity." Tony blurted, shocking Steve. This hadn't been exactly what he'd expected. But again, rules were rules and he'd be damned if he was gonna cheat. Only this time he was the only one who drank.

 

"Who'd have known our golden boy wasn't a virgin. So who was it? Aunt Peggy. Sharon? Spill the beans soldier" Tony rambled, does he ever stop to think? 

 

"It was on the USO tour." He dodged, it was true, but letting them assume it was one of the dancers wouldn't hurt. Having said that they'd all know by the end of this damned game anyway.

 

"You dog you. This is going to be fun." Natasha teased, and Steve's stomach dropped. Natasha always knew things she shouldn't so chances are this would be bad for Steve. "Never have I ever had something in my ass." She said boldly, raising an eyebrow at her team mates triumphantly. 

 

Tony drank, that much was obvious. Clint drank, which was a bit of a surprise but given he was adventurous It wasn't that outlandish. What was a huge shocker to the team was when Steve sighed and downed his shot. Everyone but Nat and Sam gasped and you could visibly see the cogs turning. "I'm not answering any questions. That's not the game." He insisted, topping up his own glass this time. "Never have I ever has sex with someone watching." He said. Daring anyone around the table to go against him. To no ones surprise, Tony and only Tony drank.

 

"I'm beginning to see how this works." Thor stated, clearly thinking hard about something people on earth would do. "Never have I ever... Given or received a foot job." He declared, loud and God-like as always. Steve literally groaned, pouting as he reached for his drink and downed it. Thankfully Tony joined him, but from Tony it was almost expected. 

 

"No questions remember?" Steve declared, pointing at each Avenger individually. He could already feel a slight sort of buzz from the alcohol and he realised he might have to warn Bucky in advance.

 

"Alright. Just... Alright." Sam shook his head in awe, realising that America's 'innocent cinnamon roll, too good for this world, too pure.' Might not be so innocent after all. "Never have I ever watched porn with another person." 

 

Tony and Steve drank again. The others were beginning to see a pattern. 

 

"20 bucks this ones just Tony?" Clint wagered, glancing between the other three, who all agreed. "Never have I ever made a sex tape." Clint whispered, watching Tony expectantly. Everyone who knew how to use the Internet knew about Tony's porn debut in a bloody security leak. Nat and Sam had begun to fish $20 out of their pockets when Steve cleared his throat. All eyes went on him and then down to his empty glass, varying expressions of shock on their faces. 

 

Steve just smiled and shrugged. "It's not like anyone was gonna see it, I wanted to see a different point of view you know?" Everyone shook their heads, Tony's more that of horror that his childhood hero was filthy as fuck.

 

"Okay, new game. Same rules only it's more focused on Rogers. We think of something kinky, and see if Rogers has done it with who ever it could possibly be." Tony added sarcastically. Thankfully, Steve was just past that line of caring, he was well on his way to being drunk. So he laughed and shrugged, allowing them their fun. Bucky had said he thought they should be more open, then they wouldn't have to confine it to their floor. 

 

Nat: "Alright. I'll start. Never have I ever been double penetrated, that includes toys." 

 

Drink

 

Thor: "never have I ever swallowed."

 

Drink

 

Sam: "never have I ever used a vibrator"

 

Drink

 

Clint: "never have I ever used a blindfold or restraints"

 

Drink

 

Tony: "never have I ever... Been fisted."

 

... _sigh_  Drink

 

"Jesus Rogers? Really?" Clint cried, slightly disturbed at who their captain really was. 

 

Steve just giggled and nodded, "keep em coming guys. I'm drunk now so I'll play along whatever. Oh, JARVIS? Can you warn Bucky please? I don't want to worry him." Steve mumbled, sleepy but very content. Whatever was in the Asgardian liquor, it was damn fine. 

 

"Fine." Tony grit out, determined to find something Rogers and Barnes hadn't done together. "Never have I ever spent the day with a vibrator butt plug up my ass having to carry out day to day activities like meetings and saving the world while my significant other has the controls." He slapped his hand on the table, glaring at Steve while the bastard just responded with a shit eating grin. Reaching for his glass, he made a show of letting all the liquid slowly trickle into his mouth. 

 

"Oh yeah. I remember that day. Started nice and easy but as soon as you had your meeting with Fury I kicked it up a notch. And then that charity fundraiser at the fair? Oh man I don't know how you did it. You were so worn out at the end, how many times did you come? Must have been at least 20, and then an extra 5? Or was it 6? You just begged and begged for more, I'm pretty sure you were crying by the end of it. 'Cause you're my filthy little cockslut ain't you Stevie?" Bucky rolled over the back of the couch and met Steve's awaiting lips. Head tipped back in a Spider-Man kiss. Everyone had been so engrossed in the dame that they hadn't even heard Bucky enter.

 

"Urrmm, I think I need to sleep. Is everyone else seeing and hearing this or am I hallucinating?" Clint muttered, unable to comprehend what exactly was happening. 

 

"No, no. You heard it. So did I. Come on Clint, let's go to bed so our brains can process... This." Natasha stood and waved a hand in Steve and Bucky's direction. Clint hurried to follow, clambering to his feet and rushing towards the elevator Bucky had just vacated. 

 

"Did I win?" Steve asked dopily, a sated grin on his lips. Bucky laughed and began to play with his hair, sending shivers down his spine. It was a good day. A very good day. 

 

"No Steven, you drank far more than anyone else." Thor chuckled, seeming the least shocked by the new revelations. "However I must also retire, this brand of liquor just makes me sleepy, thank you for a fine evening Captain, Anthony. Make sure he drinks plenty of water before sleeping Ja- Bucky. He'll need it." Thor smiled down at Steve from where he was now towering above. "I hope you remember this in the morning Steven. Everyone else will." He warns softly before leaving. Leaving Sam, Tony, Steve and Bucky together. 

 

"Yeah, man, I'm gonna go too. And try and forget all of this evening. I blame you Stark, all your fault." Sam mumbled, making a quick quiet exit before Tony could defend himself. 

 

"The fuck Steve? You mean to say When I was helping with your latest uniform upgrade I did actually hear buzzing? And the reason you took longer changing wasn't because it was a 'little tight' but because you were jerking off? Fucking hell Rogers!!" Tony exclaimed, scrambling to his feet and all but running from the room in a hasty getaway. 

 

Bucky laughed, really laughed. Like, head back, clutching the stomach laughter that rolled through his whole body. Steve couldn't help but join in. Seeing Bucky so happy didn't happen that often so he wanted to treasure every moment.

 

"I probably should have warned you earlier, in case you didn't want things to be said." Steve half apologised. He was glad him and Bucky were now out in the open but, now the serum was burning off the alcohol, he's starting to regret just how much was revealed. 

 

Bucky's hand simply migrated to Steve's cheek, pulling him up onto the sofa so he was hovering head to toe above Bucky. "Don't worry about it, their reactions make up for it, and I'm figuring you're going to be way more embarrassed than me tomorrow." He pointed out. Steve could already feel his buzz wearing off, he'd like to be asleep before he fully sobered up.

 

"Good point. Can we go to bed? I'm super tired. And still very tipsy so I think you'll have to carry me." Steve pouted, sitting back on his heels and waiting for Bucky to comply. Like he always did. 

 

Holding under his ass and wrapping Steve's legs around his waist, Bucky carried Steve all the wait to their room, pausing to kiss and occasionally thrust against one another. But Steve was too tired, Bucky could see it. So he set his lover down on the bed and carefully stripped him. Only just remembering to get him the water before he tucked them both under the covers. 

 

"I love you Stevie." He whispered into the crook of Steve's Neck. Nuzzling closer and tucking his legs between Steve's. 

 

"I love you too Buck, so much." Steve responded sluggishly, tightening his hold on his partner before drifted off into an alcohol calmed sleep, no dreams, no trouble.


	2. Never Could Resist...

 

Steve shivered as he woke, Bucky's fingers trailing up and down his waist. He could feel hot breath against his ear, a solid chest against his back and a hardness pressing between his cheeks. Feeling his own interest rise, scorching heat pooling in his groin, Steve pressed back into Bucky. 

 

"Morning. Did you sleep well?" Bucky asked, his voice husky and groggy. 

 

Steve turned his head so he could kiss Bucky's waiting lips. "Hmmm, very well." He said, beginning to rock his hips up and down in lazy thrusts. 

 

Bucky recoiled and shoved Steve's face forward, his nose scrunching in disgust. "Ew, morning breath. Go an brush your teeth or you won't enjoy anything this morning." He thrusted to illustrate his point before shoving Steve away and taking all the covers.

 

"Urghhh, you're an ass." Steve groaned, heading quickly to the bathroom to quickly clean his teeth and rinse with mouthwash. When he returned, Bucky had discarded the covers to the floor and was lazily stroking himself with his metal arm. He was propped up by pillows against the headboard, eyes closed, mouth slightly open, shoulders rising and falling in deep controlled breaths. It was such an erotic picture that Steve's steps faltered, his hand clutching at his leaking shaft to prevent spilling over the floor.

 

"What you waiting for Rogers? Get over here so we can hopefully break another bed." Bucky spoke without opening his eyes, his breath hitching as he ran a cool thumb over his head. Steve moaned and staggered to the bed, crawling to Bucky's side. Instantly his hand joined his lovers. Squeezing and stroking. Double the sensations, double the feeling. 

 

"Roll over, I  _need_  to be in you." Bucky growled hoarsely, reaching to grab the lube rom the bedside. Steve turned onto his side, his back to Bucky in the foetal position. This was something the two loved best, it reminded them both of before the war. When they were young. Steve mostly bone and a whole foot shorter than Bucky, still growing from puberty. Steve fit so easily next to Bucky, like a matching piece of a puzzle. Strong hands caressing his skin with such care, as though if he held on too hard Steve would just shatter.

 

Bucky acted the same during the war, always being gentle and soft with his touches despite the fact that Steve now had a few inches on him. Steve craved more but he knew not to push his best friend, his love. Bucky was stubborn and they often ended up in an argument so Steve gave up trying. 

 

Now, after his dip in the Potomac, over a year of searching and long gruelling months of helping Bucky recover, Steve finally got what he wanted: Bucky to fuck him hard so that he felt it the next morning, and the morning after that. Even with the serum. 

 

But Steve still loved when Bucky handled him with care. The way he would rock slowly into him, kiss the back of his neck. Their bodies pressed together from head to toe. All heat and breathy moans, whispered "I love you's" and hours of bliss. 

 

So 75 years later, with Bucky's fingers stretching him open, Steve could not be more content. He pushed back onto his fingers while Bucky pushes in. He could feel every inch and every slight change in shape. Side effect of the serum, every time he was penetrated it was as though he hadn't before. It was more of a privilege really, Steve loved the way Bucky worked him open. He took his time, rubbing circles around his entrance until he was shivering. Then he would press the tip of one finger in, twisting and circling in. Slowly going deeper and deeper until he was in to the knuckle. 

 

He gave Steve a few thrusts with the single finger to tease him, sometimes he would be jerking him off at the same time. If he particularly wanted things to be difficult he would turn the vibrate function on his arm on. Not this time though, this was his flesh and bone hand. Twisting and scissoring, stretching him wide enough so it wouldn't hurt. Bucky was sizeable to say the least, always larger than Captain America no matter how much super-serum ran through his blood.

 

When Bucky pulled out Steve basically whined. He knew that what was coming was better but he never wanted to feel empty the way he did now. 

 

"Please. Buck. I need you." He choked, reaching back and clutching the back of Bucky's head. 

 

Bucky made quick work of slicking himself, the didn't worry about condoms as they never bothered in the 40's. He pressed a kiss just behind his ear, reaching down to draw Steve's leg up. He shifted down and pressed his head against Steve's entrance. He tugged his leg between Steve's open ones, pressing the tips of his teeth into the curve of his neck gently marking him as his own.

 

Then he pushed home, swiftly breaching the rim and sliding to the hilt. Both Bucky and Steve expelled hushed moans, craving the contact they had grown accustomed to but hadn't been able to get now with them both being back in the field. 

 

It didn't take long for Steve to get accustomed, soon he was panting with need, rutting against Bucky and turning to kiss him properly, nibbling his bottom lip. Bucky got the message quickly enough, pulling out almost all the way before sliding back in. He thrust in time with their breathing: in... out, in... out. Painstakingly slow but beautifully exquisite. 

 

Steve could feel himself getting close despite not being touched, it was always this way whenever they made love. The emotional element always heightened things for Steve, and the angle made sure Bucky was stroking his prostate each thrust. He knew there was a small puddle on the bed, there always was. 

 

He could tell that Bucky was in a similar state, his breathing, and therefore his pace, had picked up in speed. Which, in turn pushed Steve frustratingly closer but never pushing over, he was wound so tight, he didn't know how long he could last. 

 

"God Bucky. Please, I need to- can I come?" Steve whined, threading his fingers through Bucky's long hair, grasping tight the way he knew Bucky loved. 

 

"Not just yet Stevie. Just hold on a little longer. Can you do that baby doll?" Bucky said, reaching round and grasping his cock, stroking him just to test his limits. 

 

"Oh god, I- uhh Bucky, please?" Steve moaned, pushing back to meet each of Bucky's thrusts. His lover then brought their lips together in a scorching, open-mouthed kiss. It was the only 'yes' Steve would have ben able to understand at this point. 

 

Feeling Bucky pulse inside him, Steve let go, hot spurts of white shooting up his chest and sprinkling on the bed, his moans and cries were swallowed down by Bucky. Who was spilling his seed inside Steve, returning the lust filled sounds to their owner. 

 

Coming down from the high was always pleasant, Bucky lazily stroked Steve though his orgasm, drawing it out and making him twitch in sensitivity. When he pulled out he rolled Steve onto his back and lay between his legs. Making his way up the hairless chest of America, clearing up his orgasm.

 

Steve shivered and laughed, they were both covered in sweat and breathing heavily but neither had ever been happier. Despite all the loss and pain and torture they had both suffered, they had both come out on top and were better for it. The had a family that loved them, no matter their sexuality. 

 

Suddenly a thought filtered through the haze in Steve's mind. "Shit! They know like everything. How much of a kinky person I am. How am I supposed to lead them when all they can think of is your hand up my ass?" He panicked, his hands migrating to his head.

 

"Woah, woah hey, Steve. It's okay, they won't think that." Bucky assures, reaching up and prying his hand away, holding them on the back of his neck, where it comforts both. "What you do in bed is none of their business, they forced it out of you. I don't care that they know but if they can't separate the two? Then I'll care. I mean look at Stark,  we all knew about the shit he did long before he decided to get you drunk, do you look at him any differently?" 

 

Steve shook his head, an appreciative smile on his lips. "Exactly. Now come on, it's out turn to make breakfast and we only have time for one person to shower." He winked, sliding off the bed and dragging Steve with him. Knowing that their shower would last longer than if they showered separately.

 

But then, Steve never could resist Bucky. 


	3. The morning after

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was a little cautious about uploading this chapter, it was supposed to be light hearted and funny but it ended up being feelsy and I am really sorry, it was an accident. Constructive criticism is always appreciated, as is love and kudos, hope you like it :)

"Do you super soldiers have an aversion to shirts?" Clint chirped, dropping down from the overhanging balcony above the kitchen. "Every morning at least one of them doesn't have a shirt on. It's very emasculating..." He grumbled to Tony. Who, to be honest, actually appreciated the view. 

"That's a  _big_  word Barton..." Bucky quipped. "Cooking is hot work, all the steam and whatnot. I overheat and that messes with the mechanics." he then explained, waving a spatula in the direction of his prosthetic.

"So what's you're excuse spangles? Not that I'm complaining." Tony wiggles his eyebrows over his mug of coffee. Steve shuffled awkwardly on his feet as Bucky growled. He was glad he had the fridge door to hide behind.

"Buck complained that 'all my shirts are too fucking tight and he's only getting half the picture'. So he hid all my clothes." Steve said, hoping his voice sounded as confident as he'd intended. Clint and Tony gaped at him (free use of the f-word increased the shock element), the others not having emerged yet. "Yes he hid my clothes and I let him. He picks out what I wear. Always used to in the 40's, I have no sense of colour coordination." Steve rambled as he retrieved the various breakfast foods that didn't require cooking. He was helpless at that too. 

"You know I'm starting to think Rogers' breasts are bigger than mine." Natasha chimed as she strode in. Silent and lithe as a dancer, making everyone jump. All eyes went to Steve's very toned tits. Then flitting over to Nat's and very quickly back to Steve's in fear of being beaten to death. 

In the end, Bucky set his current culinary delight (scrambled eggs, Bucky couldn't really cook either) in the centre of the island and promptly grasped both of Steve's pecs in his hands, making Steve's face and neck head up. After a few squeezes, Bucky removed them and turned to Natasha, arms outstretched in a request. Sighing, she placed her hands on her hips and pushed her chest out, allowing Bucky to compare. 

"I'd say they're about even." He concluded, grabbing the mixer and the ingredients for batter. Steve was still bright red, hands slightly raised and not exactly knowing what to do. In the end he just poured a bowl of Cheerios and quietly began to eat.

"What the hell did I just witness?" Sam asked. Paused at the bottom the the stairs with wide eyes. Clint and Tony had similar expressions. "I am not awake enough for this." He muttered to himself, plonking down next to Tony and eagerly taking the waiting coffee.

"It appears I over dressed this fine morning." Thor bellowed, promptly removing his shirt and joining them at the table. Sam, Tony and Clint groaned loudly, no one could compare with Thor, not even the biggest body builders. 

"You know, I'm seeing what you mean about 'emasculating'..." Bucky said, adding a stack of pancakes to the masses of food already on the island. 

"Okay,  what did I miss? Why aren't they wearing shirts?" Bruce sighed, shuffling over in baggy sweats and a hoody, rubbing his eyes as though he wasn't sure he was awake. 

"Well, Brucey bear, Bucky gets hot when cooking so decided to forgo clothing. When he doesn't wear shirts, Steve doesn't either as Barnes has control of Capsicle's wardrobe. And Thor just likes to follow the crowd." Tony clarified as though it was another experiment: scientific and concise. "Oh, and Steve likes having large things up his ass." He added, snickering at the shock on Bruce's face.

 

*************

_"You like having things up your ass? I'll make you hate it so you can be normal and like women, like your supposed to!"_

Steve dropped his bowl on the way to the sink, shards spraying in every direction as it shattered. The sound echoed in his head the same way each breath was all he could hear. He felt his recently calmed blush flare up, trailing far down his chest, all around the back of his neck and warming his spine. He was frozen in place, shame flowing through his entire body. He wanted to be anywhere but here right now. 

The team was silent, they all knew Tony had no tact but they thought he might be a little less brunt. No one in the team was especially prudish but Steve still came from the 1940's. Having his sex life talked about like the weather was not something he was comfortable with, especially when sober. He still hasn't moved, partially from the sharp crockery surrounding his feet but mostly because he feared that if he moved, he would get noticed. And if he got noticed then people would ask him questions he didn't want to answer. 

  
Steve's view of the sink was disturbed by gorgeous grey eyes, laced with concern. "Hey Stevie?" Bucky murmured carefully, caressing either side of his neck, the metal hand cool and grounding. "Steve. We're gonna go okay? Come one, just follow me. One step in front of the other, don't worry about the bowl, you heal." Bucky pulled Steve out of the kitchen, not letting him look away. Not until they were in they in the studio next door. T he room was long and wide, various easels and drawing tables were placed in key areas where the light was just right. There were a few sofas and chairs with a perfect view of the sunset cityscape that Steve loved to paint.   


"Stevie? Baby doll? Steve you're scaring me. Please respond." Bucky was gently tapping his cheeks and chest, trying to get him to snap out of it. 

"It's so much worse than I thought it was gonna be. Bucky, oh god they won't ever think of me in the same way, they'll call me 'captain cock-slut'. Fuck, Bucky! Im supposed to be a leader, an icon, it was hard enough before but if this gets out I'll never be able to gain respect again. It'll be like before, everyone looking down on the dirty little faggot, taking advantage. I can't do that again Bucky! I can't- Buck- shit!" Steve was gripping his hair to control the tremors, eyes flitting around the room in panic, chest constricting and preventing him for breathing. 

"Christ Steve! Stevie!" Bucky cried, a sense of de ja vu coming over him as he pried Steve's hands away from his head. "They don't think that. No one is going to call you a faggot, times have changed. But Steve, you need to calm down. Breeeeaaaath, stop looking around as though someone is about to jump out at you. We're alone. No one is going to hurt you, this isn't a back alley with some dickwad twice your size forcing himself on you. 

"This is a little teasing, Stark was way out of line and I'm going to beat his ass but I need you to breath because you're scaring me." Bucky swallowed, smiling slightly when he realised the Steve had calmed. His breaths were still a little fractured and rushed but he was taking deeper breaths and his eyes were focused on Bucky.

"There we go, it's okay. Ironic how my ramblings calm you but hey. Whatever works." He laced their fingers together and held on tight. "I'll always protect you Stevie. You know that. So we are gonna go back in there and finish our breakfast, I'm starving and I'll be sure to use my murder eyes so people know I'm angry. 'Cause I am, Stark is an ass and shouldn't have said what he did. 

"There's still a lot about you people don't know babydoll. They're not about to find out anytime soon either, not if you don't want them to. I'll even keep us quiet to the public eye if you like?" Steve shook his head at this, hating how long they'd kept it quiet from the team. "Okay, alright, but we take our time. We organise an official statement and we do it properly. I won't let anyone hurt you Stevie, not after last time." He grit out, feeling his anger spike once again.

"Thank you, Buck. Even being the size I am now I'll never stop feeling protected by you." Steve whispered, leaning in to kiss him softly before facing the inevitable.

 

*************

* * *

"Steve, I have been informed that my comment-" Tony's apology was cut off with a fist to his jaw, thankfully not the metal one or it would be shattered. Still, the force was enough to knock him to the floor, his ears ringing.

 

"You make another comment about last night and you'll find yourself disabled. That goes for everyone else as well. Thor, next time, ration your damned liquor." Bucky growled, glaring at everyone, challenging them to question him. 

 

No one did, obviously. They only knew he wasn't the Winter Soldier because Steve was clinging very timidly to his side. There were no more smiles, everyone nodded and no one helped Tony, knowing full well he'd deserved the hit.

 

"Good." He turned to Steve and lowered his voice. "Is today gonna be a gym day or a sketching day?" He asked softly. It wasn't just the winter soldier who had bad days, most of the team suffered PTSD to some extent and they all had their own ways of coping. 

 

Steve wasn't sure, he looked to Sam and Natasha, both had looks of concern but both knew when not to ask. "Bit of both, I think. I'll draw while you spar and join in when I feel like it." He decided, kissing Bucky's forehead and waiting for him to move. 

 

Everyone was silent over the rest of breakfast, no one wanting to risk the possibility of Bucky disabling them. Tony was pressing a bag frozen peas to his jaw, already sporting a nice large purple bruise. 

 

The only sounds made were of people appreciating the pancakes and waffles. Bucky felt proud that he was the reason behind the little 'humms' and 'mmmm's. Him, the winter soldier, deadly assassin was cooking breakfast for the ridiculous family he'd been included into. 

 

Steve didn't move more than a foot away from him the entire time, eyes dropped to his food and shoulders drawn in protectively. The bowl had been cleaned up in their absence so thankfully Steve didn't have to face that.   

 

A man usually so calm, so controlled, loosing that control in an instant? Bucky knew Steve would have found that extremely humiliating. He hated showing his weakness more than feeling weak in general. The only time he let his guard down was when he was with Bucky, who would have called him out on it if he tried to hide it anyway. Years and years of experience made Steve realise that keeping things from Bucky often did more harm than good.

 

There were times Bucky didn't really know what was best to do for Steve though. This was one of them. The awful night In 1935, when Steve was 17, was another. Bucky had found him in the darkest corner of the stingiest alleyway in Brooklyn. He was curled tightly in on himself, his trousers round his mid thigh. He was trembling violently, tears streaming his cheeks. 

 

Bucky bundled Steve up in his arms, stricken by how tight the smaller clung to him. Bucky pressed a kiss into his hair and kept telling him that everything would be okay. He just about managed not to  _run_  all the way home. 

 

Sarah helped him get Steve in bed, singing a lullaby from their childhood to help him get to sleep. The wonderful woman then made him a hot cocoa and held him while he cried for his friend, not knowing what he could do to make this better. When Steve climbed on his lap and kissed him the following day he let it happen, he didn't make any moves forward, just let Steve take control. He made sure to stop him before things got too far, as much as he wanted Steve's hands down his pants he couldn't let him do it. 

 

"Stevie...." He whispered, fingers gently wrapping around his wrists. "Don't, not- not now." He explained, leaning up to kiss him again. He wasn't exactly sure why Steve was acting like this but if it helped then Bucky was all too willing to lend a hand. He didn't want Steve to feel alone. 

 

So, back in 2015, Bucky didn't let Steve leave his sight for longer than five minutes. The whole team had eyes on him for most of the morning, taking turns to spar against each other. Although, no one let Bucky spar with Tony. Even in the suit. Bucky knew it wasn't really Tony's fault but no one wanted to risk that anyway.

 

Eventually, everyone fizzles out of the training room, either to get food or whatever reason they had. Bucky didn't care. It just left him and Steve, who had been sketching for the last hour and a half. 

 

"Hey, Stevie. Get over here." Bucky said, moving into a fighting stance and becoming him with one finger. Steve looked up with a raised eyebrow, a grin forming when he saw Bucky.

 

"Why?" He asked simply, putting his pad to the side and making his way over anyway.

 

"Maybe I want to train with you." Bucky deadpanned, even though they already had. 

 

"We know each other's fight styles too well Bucky. Us training together is pointless. We decided that earlier." Steve pointed out. Not willing to back out, Steve mirrored his position, amusement in his eyes. 

 

Bucky was glad to see him smiling again, unable to stop his own growing. "Well, maybe it's time for a re-match?" He teased, reaching down to grab the knife he always kept strapped to his ankle.

 

"We both know I'd win." Steve grunted, blocking Bucky's first attack. Easily ducking his punches. 

 

"Hey, I won last time." Bucky complained, straightening up and putting his hands on his hips like a petty child. Unfortunately this threw Steve off balance and he landed flat on his back. Bucky snorted biting his lip to try and hold in his laugh. Steve glared up at him, making it harder for Bucky to hold in his giggles. 

 

"Oh, so you think this is funny, hey Buck?" He growled, rolling onto his side and looking through his eyelashes. Bucky immediately stopped laughing. This side of Steve was not one to be challenged. 

 

"Nope, not at all." He muttered, tucking his hands behind his back in a parade rest. Steve raised his eyebrow, sitting up and spreading his legs. His training uniform was thinner than his actual uniform, less need for body armour and such, so it was almost like a second skin. Each of his muscles were outlined perfectly and Bucky was having a hard time not looking at his exposed crotch.

 

"Are you sure about that?" Steve asks, pushing up onto his feet and crowding Bucky. Their mouths millimetres apart. Bucky gasped and looked up the tiny amount. 

 

"Pretty sure." Bucky murmured, suddenly very timid. Steve wrapped an arm around his waist, pulling tight and lifting Bucky off the ground. Bucky made a very embarrassing squeak, wrapping his arms and legs around Steve. 

 

"Fancy a swim?" Steve asked, walking them both in the direction of the pool anyway. Stark tower really was a marvel, the gym occupied two floors, the pool on the upper and built down into the lower.

 

"I don't have swim stuff." Bucky says meekly, his nose bumping into Steve's each step. He knew that was a shit excuse as the changing rooms were fully stocked with everything they would possibly need. Probably including condoms and lube. 

 

"Don't need swim stuff." Steve said, his grip never faltering around Bucky's waist.

 

"Oh, really? Let's hope Stark doesn't mind skinny dipping." He whispered, leaning in to press his lips to Steve's. A short trip in the lift and down a corridor had them being hit in the face with the scent of chlorine. Bucky loved it, the slightly humid air relaxed him and helped him forget the cryostatis. 

 

Steve unhooked Bucky's legs and set him down, only breaking apart  to pull Bucky's shirt off and then continuing the sweet kisses they both loved. His own suit was a one-piece that zipped up at the back, all he needed to do was let Bucky pull it off him. 

 

The two were soon naked and bumping into one another, filled cocks brushing and pulling moans from both men. "I do actually want to get in the water Buck." Steve muttered between kisses, pulling away and picking Bucky up again, wiggling his eyebrows and tossing him into the deep end of the pool, swiftly diving in after him. 

 

Bucky emerged grumpily and swam up to him and hooked his legs back around Steve's waist, rutting against him enthusiastically. "C'mon Steve, you gonna give me what I want or not?" He asked, feeling control swing in his direction again. Steve swam them both to the shallower end of the pool so he could stand, hands on Bucky's ass, pulling apart. 

 

"Oh I don't know Buck. Why don't you tell me what it is you want and I'll see if you've earned it..." He drawled, nipping at Bucky's pouting lip and grinning mischievously.

 

"You know what I want." He whined, pushing himself higher so he could run Steve's engorged dick between his parted cheeks. Steve gasped at the feeling and Bucky took the opportunity to dive in, exploring Steve's tongue with his own. The former sighed deeply, one hand migrating into Bucky's dripping hair, the other slipping lower to rub circles around his entrance. 

 

Bucky moaned, the touch he'd been craving he was now getting. Steve's deft fingers making him shiver and hug even tighter. He could feel Steve's head brush against his balls and he never realised how hot that could actually be. The water was warm but it was nothing compared to the heat radiating of both men, he wasn't even inside Bucky yet and they were panting and making little 'ahh's and 'uhmm's. 

 

After a few more minutes of kissing and touching, Steve pressed his forefinger in. Bucky sighed into Steve's mouth, he always loved the feeling of Steve entering him. More often than not Steve was the bottom but in the few times since his return that Steve had given in to Bucky's pleas, it had been much more intense.

 

The very first time Steve had given in had been just before he fell from the train. Steve had been so careful and reserved. Still not entirely used to his increased strength and size yet and taking caution about Bucky after him being tortured. But he hadn't backed out, he'd taken his time opening him up on the snowy mountain side, kept his pace slow, only rested his hands on Bucky's hips, he didn't grip them like he craved but beggars couldn't be choosers. Bucky came so hard that night he blacked out for a few seconds; scared the shit out of Steve but he was glad they'd done it, if he'd have fallen without crossing that boundary he wouldn't know how to cope.

 

Once he returned Steve was much more willing to give in, having got used to his strength and Bucky now matching it there was no real chance of them hurting one another. He was still careful though, and Bucky wouldn't have it any other way. So he thought.

 

Steve had progressed to three fingers now, Bucky rolling his hips and impaling himself deeper, water sloshing around them. "I'm ready Stevie. Please." He panted, lifting all the way off his fingers and waiting for Steve to do the rest. 

 

Before he lined up, Steve waded through the water until Bucky hit the wall. His eyebrows furrowed in confusion when Steve unhooked his ankles. Understanding dawned when they were lifted above Steve's head, his shoulders in Bucky's knees. 

 

"This okay, Buck?"   Steve asked, now a little concerned. Bucky chuckled, reaching to pull Steve closer, bending him more. 

 

"This is plenty okay, please fuck me." He hissed, preventing Steve from talking by locking their lips in a fiery heated kiss. He felt Steve press against his entrance, then slamming his hips forward and knocking the air out of Bucky's lungs. This was not how he usually went about it. He usually went slow and steady, gradually building up the pace. Not hard and fast from the get go. 

 

Bucky fuckin' loved it.

 

"Shit! Stevie!" He gasped, his toes curling in pleasure. Being immersed in water was also an added pleasure, one he couldn't exactly describe. Only that he felt freer, looser but at the same time more sensitised. 

 

Steve just grinned, slowly withdrawing and slamming back in. Bucky cried out in euphoria, head falling to the side of the pool. "Fuck Steve, keep going." He pleaded, digging his heals into his shoulders. Steve complied and started a fast hard rhythm, driving up and pushing Bucky back against the wall, creating the perfect angle to hit his sweet spot each time. 

 

Bucky could not keep quiet, each thrust made him moan and grunt and whine like a bitch in heat. As he got closer they became whimpers and gasps, clawing at Steve's back. What made it better was when Steve grasped his shaft and began to pump. Bucky couldn't hold it in, he came long and hard, crying out with each spurt that floated away with the water. 

 

Steve followed shortly after, panting and grunting into Bucky's neck, his seed spilling out of the sides of his filled ass. Bucky stroked through his hair while they both calmed, panting and smiling wide. Eventually, he slowly pulled out and carefully lowered Bucky's legs, holding him close so he didn't wobble. 

 

"Where on earth did that come from?" He asked incredulously, bending his knees to increase blood flow. 

 

Steve shrugged, walking towards the steps with Bucky in his arms. "Don't really know, guess it was an impulse. You're okay right?" He fretted, making Bucky laugh.

 

"I'm more than okay. I am completely sated and on one hell of a post orgasmic high right now. Albeit a little tired, some of us didn't take breaks to draw earlier." He teased, pushing up and out of the pool before Steve, shivering at the temperature change.

 

"Good, we might find our selves exploring a little more... I enjoyed that more than I probably should have." He muttered, blushing adorably. He pulled himself out of the pool and shook himself, grabbing towels from the nearby hooks and chucking one at Bucky. 

 

"Hey, enough of that. You enjoy sex as much as you want so long as it's with me." Bucky chided playfully, wrapping the huge towel around him like a cape. "C'mon, I think we can fit in a nap before the movie." He suggested, his hand outstretched. Steve took it willingly, pressing close to Bucky's side as they returned to the elevator. 

 

"JARVIS?" Steve asked once they were back on their floor. "Please erase all footage from the last hour from the pool. Also, can you organise it to be cleaned before next use." He requested, no longer feeling awkward about talking to nothing. 

 

"Certainly, Mr Rogers. Is there anything else you require?" The automated butler responded. 

 

"Could you wake us with enough time to clean up before we go downstairs?" Bucky added, tugging back the covers and losing the towel, sliding into bed and holding his arm out for Steve to cuddle up. 

 

"With pleasure, Mr Barnes. Sleep well." Was the last thing the two heard before drifting comfortably into a light sleep.


	4. Please no...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky has to go away for arm maintenance, unfortunately the trip takes longer than expected and some old nightmares have returned to haunt Steve's sleep. With no Bucky to turn to, Steve opens up to someone new for the first time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for this chapter: discussion (but not detailed) of past rape and a nightmare recalling some of the events, again, not too detailed. Also, had to up the chapter count to 5 as it was taking forever for me to write and I felt bad. I am very proud to have written much more than 10k words however, especially in what is supposed to be a one-shot series...

_*************_

_"Hey, back off, leave her alone!" Steve growled, glaring up at the douche bag holding a young woman's wrists up against the wall, his face buried in her neck. It was by chance he'd seen anything, on his way home from art college passing by alley after alley when a cry for help startled him._

  _Wishing he'd brought his torch, Steve slowly made his way down into the soggy little street dwarfed by buildings either side. There was very little light to see by but the shapes made it easy to understand what was going on. And by the sounds of it only one person was enjoying things._

  _Naturally, Steve felt he had to put an end to it._

 " _Aww, look. It's the boy who never grew up, go back to wherever-land." The man jibed, returning his lips to the girls neck, very obviously unwelcome. Steve rolled his eyes at the insult regarding his height, people really were scraping the barrel these days._

  _Gritting his teeth, he took a handful of the worn jacket and pulled back as hard as he could. "I said,_ back off _! She doesn't want your attention!"_

  _Thankfully, this did get the slimy bastard to let go, stepping away from the girl and driving his fist into Steve's ribs. All the air whooshed out of him in a rush, barely managing to get out a quick 'run!' To the shaking brunette still frozen against the wall. Without thinking twice, she fled, allowing Steve to sag in relief._

  _"Thanks a lot you little faggot!" The man spat down at him. "Guess I'll have to find another way to deal with my_ needs _." He sneered. Steve clambered to his feet, holding his little fists up, thumbs under the knuckles but out from under the fingers. Just like Bucky taught him. The scumbag just laughed, deep and menacing, almost like a predators growl. Steve frowned, narrowing his eyes in confusion. Why wasn't the guy beating him yet? Why was he laughing?_

  _Understanding dawned on him when the mans hands migrated to his already undone belt. And he'd never been more frightened. In a blind fit of panic, Steve swung his right fist towards the mans face, almost a foot above him but still within range. As per usual, however, his fist didn't get the opportunity to make contact as it had been grabbed and sharply twisted so his front was now painfully up against the wall._

  _"What are you-" the man used his free hand to literally rip his trousers off of him, pressing close behind him._

  _"This is your fault,_ faggot _! You deserve everything you get!" He growled. Steve felt tears prick the back of his eyes when he realised there was no way out of this._

_"Please, don't." He tried lamely. Wriggling about to see if he could find a way out. The guy was very strong though, and didn't much like Steve's attempts to get away._

  _"Shut your whore mouth you little princess. I know you want this, and you're gonna enjoy it or you won't be able to walk tomorrow!" He growled, slamming his chest into the wall, he could feel his chin graze open against it._

  _It was nothing compared to the pain he then experienced. It was like the lighting of a fire and it instantly exploding._

_*************_

_"Help! BUC-"_

 "KY!" Steve shot up in bed, looking around in the darkness to find the bed empty. "Bucky?" He called, flying out of bed and running to the bathroom. His panic already heightened from his dream. "Bucky where are you!?" He shouted, sprinting around his floor wandering where an earth Bucky could be. He didn't leave without telling Steve. Never.

 "Captain Rogers, might I remin-" 

 "JARVIS! Where is he. Is he okay? Is it hydra? Do we need to assemble?" He worried, heading towards the elevator that was opening to reveal Sam. He was wearing sweatpants and a sleep messed t-shirt. It was clear he'd just got out of bed.

 "Captain Rogers. Mr Barnes is currently in Malibu with-" Jarvis attempted explaining but Steve was far too gone to allow him. 

 "Malibu? Why is he in Malibu? Sam, get suited up, we need to find him. We need- Sam. Why aren't you doing anything?" Steve's energy drained a little when he saw the vague pity and concern on Sam's face. "Sam? Why are you down here? I don't- what's going on?" His legs felt wobbly and he wasn't sure if he was breathing or not so he let Sam lead him to the sofa. 

 "Steve, what happened, you know why Bucky's in Malibu. You remember right?" Sam asked tentatively, he had a lot of warning lights flashing in his mind with Steve's behaviour. 

 Steve frowned, struggling to shake his posts dream haze and residual fear. "Um, he's with Tony right? He has a home in Malibu." It was slowly coming back to him. "His arm," he sighed. "It was malfunctioning. He needed a certain part, or a specific tool that Tony doesn't have here but he does have in Malibu. So they've gone there with Nat to fix it, you all think we’re co-dependant and think time apart will be good. Should only be a few days they said. And that was two days ago." Steve recalled, rubbing his eyes and sighing shakily. 

 Sam reached out and squeezed his shoulder, gently coxing his hands away. "That's right, they're safe. No hydra, no one trying to take him away from you, though maybe you’re co-dependant for a reason. What happened though? It's 2am, why are you awake?" He asked, thinking he already knew the answer. 

 "I er, I had a nightmare..." He mumbled, Sam nodded, he was right. The only problem was that with Steve there was a plethora of nightmares that plagued him. 

 "Was it the falling? Or the ice?" He queried, knowing that he might need to fetch lots of blankets. Spending over a year traipsing around the world in search of Barnes meant that Sam had experienced many an early morning shaking Steve free from his fears. Steve didn't look particularly cold, though, so Sam was guessing it wasn't an ice trip this time. 

 "Neither actually. I can't really remember it. I'm fine now Sam, you can go. I'm sorry you got woken." Steve said, standing and making his way back to his room. 

 "That's not gonna happen. I'm gonna kip here for the rest of the night so if you wake up again I'm here. If you can't sleep and want to talk, I'm here. If you can't sleep and don't want to talk, apparently I'm a good cuddler." Steve smiled lightly at his statement. "I'm  _here_  Steve. I know you'd rather have Barnes with you but... I'm kinda trained to help. It's understandable you don't wanna talk to a stranger, Steve, but I really think you ought to speak to someone." Sam said seriously, getting himself comfortable on the large sofa. They'd had this conversation a few times now, Steve stubbornly declining any help Sam had offered, deciding to grin and bear it no matter how tough it got.

 Steve swallowed, blinking a few times and shaking his head. Without another word he turned and left to go back to his room. Sam sighed, he'd figured as much but he always hoped. Pulling the blanket over him, Sam settled and closed his eyes, not fully dropping into a deep sleep so he'd be able to hear Steve instead of having to rely on JARVIS.

* * *

Five days had passed and Bucky still hadn't returned. Needless to say Steve wasn't doing very well. Sam had needed to stop him from getting on his bike and riding up to Malibu, settling on a phone call instead. 

 ("Stevie, please stop worrying. I'm fine, my arm is just taking a little longer than expected. Stark's been surprisingly good company."

 

"Will you be home soon?"

 

"He says it will need a couple more days, he's had to remove the forearm to get to the source. And it's all buggy apparently. Is everything okay?" 

 

"I haven't been sleeping well, Buck. The old nightmares came back..." 

 

"Oh Stevie, I can come back, if you need me to. Sam sounded worried on the phone but I had no idea it was that bad."

 

"No, don't do that, get your arm fixed. I- I'm okay. I guess it just helps when you're next to me..."

 

 _Pause_  

 

"Steve, I know you find it hard, but maybe you should consider talking to Sam. He's helped me on a couple of occasions, nothing I haven't already told you, don't worry. But it made me feel better, having someone other than you know. We know everything about each other Stevie, but right now I can't help you. I wish I could but I can't curl around you and keep you safe while you sleep, talking to Sam might help lessen the need for that."

 

"I don't know Buck, it's a bit more personal than other things." 

 

"I get that, by Sam won't be anything less that professional, he certainly won't tell anyone else on the team, he knows what would happen to him if he did. Please, just think about it yeah?"

 

"Okay. I miss you."

 

"I miss you too babydoll, I love you. Good night."

 

"I love you more, night Bucky.")

 

Sam was sleeping on Steve's couch regularly now to stop him sneaking out, and to give him the same statement every night: "I'm here for you."

 Thankfully there had been no invasions or attacks in the time Bucky's been away, however that meant Steve didn't have a lot to do. It gave him plenty of time to dwell on things and seclude himself away. After the call from Bucky, Steve decided that maybe he could open u to someone else. It had been 80 years since it happened and Steve probably should have spoken to a professional about I at the time. But then the war came and it just seemed so unimportant that he mostly forgot about it. It returned in his dreams every so often but then new ones took over, much worse dreams, where his best friend fell to his death, and then the immobilising ice. If there’s one thing Steve learned, it was that things could always get worse, no matter how bad they seemed.

 But if Bucky could trust Sam enough to open up about his past then so could Steve. He had to quit being a pansy and live up to the bravery he was known for. The only problem was that this was no fire fight, he wasn’t going up against hydra agents or Nazi’s. these were his own fears, his own demons that he thought he’d faced long ago. If it hadn’t been for Tony’s stupid comment he wouldn’t be having this problem. He could do it, he would do it. If not for himself then for Bucky. By the sounds of things, Sam and Bucky had been conversing regularly, often about him. Plus, Steve didn’t want to worry Bucky any more than he already was.

 He’s already talked himself out of taking Sam up on his offer twice, rationalising that ‘it was unfair to wake Sam so early in the morning’. Even if he knew Sam’s day was free so he could sleep as long as he needed to. It was now 5am and Steve hadn’t slept a wink in two days, partially scared to repeat the dream and partially contemplating opening up. A week had passed since Bucky left and in that time Steve had revisited _that_ night in various different places about 10 times. And he’d had enough.

 “Sam?” Steve whispered, sitting on the short bit of the ‘L’ of his sofa, for whatever reason Sam had refused to take the spare room. “Sam.” He said louder, slightly hoping that he wouldn’t wake. Things didn’t go Steve’s way however as Sam grumbled and partially opened his eyes, sitting up and instantly becoming more alert when he saw the reason for him waking.

“Steve, hey man, is everything okay? Did you dream again?” he asked quickly, moving so he was facing Steve full on and not from the side.

“Not- not exactly…” Steve stuttered nervously, playing with the leg of his sweat pants. Taking a deep breath, he took a leap of faith and looked into Sam’s worried waiting eyes. “if it’s not too late, I was, um , I was wandering I-if I could maybe, take the offer to talk?” he struggled but he managed to get it out. Sam’s face both relaxed and lit up at the same time, his worry lessening and relieved that Steve had chosen him.

“Of course it’s not too late, man. You want some hot cocoa to go with it? I’ve been reliably informed, by your boyfriend, that it helps.” Steve didn’t get time to answer as Sam had already thrown his blankets off and was on his way to the kitchen. Steve shrugged and tucked himself in the he corner Sam had just vacated, knees close to his chest, tugging the blanket over his lap as though it was some sort of barrier that would protect him. Sam returned shortly after he’d left, with two hot steaming cups of hot chocolate, 7 mini-marshmallows floating on the top. After handing it over, he sat cross-legged next to Steve, above the blanket, he didn’t want to seem too familiar but figured the physical contact might comfort the super soldier the way it did the super assassin.

“I don’t know if you want a friend or a therapist right now but you can have either. Or you can talk and I give you both my opinions. Just know, Steve, that whatever it is? I won’t ever judge you on it, my opinion on you won’t change and I won’t treat you any differently. Also, I’m very pro-patient confidentiality, so anything you tell me won’t be repeated unless you ask me to. Or I deem there to be a risk to your physical health. Now we have the ‘terms and conditions’ out of the way, go ahead, what do you wanna talk about?” Sam’s words had borderline frightened Steve with how formal and scientific they sounded, it was good to know it all though, that Sam was his friend and was able to put everything to one side for him.

“I know everyone is wandering what happened the other week, when I dropped the bowl…” Sam nodded, Steve sipped his drink. “I’m not blaming him because it was in no way his fault but, what Stark said? About liking thi- about my sexuality?” Sam nodded again, showing he was listening and he remembered. Steve wasn’t sure if him keeping quiet was a good thing or not. “Well, his comment kinda triggered a memory I’d long since thought I’d buried.” Sam gasped softly, by his wording he could guess that it wasn’t a good memory. And if he remembered the comment correctly then there were very few things Steve could be remembering.

“And that then made you panic, understandable. I’m guessing it caused the dreams to come back as well, and not having Bucky here made things worse?” Sam asked, Steve nodded at each question, his head hanging a little lower. “okay, I think I know where this is headed but I’m gonna need you to be explicit with me Steve, what happened?”

*************

Steve worried his trembling lip, having to put the mug down so he didn’t spill anything. “it was in 1935, I was going home from college and I heard a girl screaming for help. I know that Bucky has told everyone of my ‘heroics’ at least once when it comes to bullies. Getting beat up was almost hobby the amount of times it happened. So naturally I hear the scream and I feel compelled to help. I couldn’t really see a whole lot down the alley but it was very obvious what the guy was trying to do. He had her wrists pinned to the wall and a hand up her skirt, I wasn’t even strong enough to pull him off. The only reason he did was to punch me. Gave the poor girl enough time to get away though, that’s what mattered. They guy then turned on me, I expected him just to have at me and leave me bleeding on the floor. But no, he was going to get what he wanted, he didn’t care where, or who, he got it from. In the grand scheme of things I guess it didn’t last very long, but it was the worst pain you could imagine. The only thing worse was the procedure, at least that was for a good cause.” Steve sniffled, only just realising how upset this was making him. Sam hadn’t yet said anything and it was a little unnerving for Steve. “Sam?” he urged, looking up to see a very pained expression; Sam’s eyes were glassy and wet, is brows drawn in and his mouth slightly open. Steve couldn’t pin it to an emotion but it was almost as though he’d been told someone he loved had died.

“I… Steve, I mean really explicitly. I can’t know for sure unless you say it.” He pressed, not unkindly though. Steve tilted his head in a pleading way, if he said it then it would be real, he’d been able to hid from it this long and he would be able to get back to it. It would just take a little time.

“Sam, you can read between the lines, you know what happened.” Steve’s fists were clutching at the blanket as though it was his life force, maybe it was, who knew.

“Steve, you need to do this.” Sam said, resting his hand over Steve’s, showing his support. He still couldn’t quite believe what was being said, and now that he knew he felt a little less guilty asking Barnes about it. Steve sighed and closed his eyes, he took a minute to prepare himself and the opened them again.

“That man _raped_ me, Sam. I stopped him raping that girl so he used me instead. Tony’s comment was similar to what he said to me and I freaked. After I wasn’t home when I was supposed to be, Bucky came looking and found me curled up in the corner. He carried me home and my mom sang me to sleep. For the most part I can forget about it but Bucky not being here has meant that the nightmare kept coming back, he usually sings the same song my mum did and it chases them away for a few years. I’m sorry you’ve had to sleep on a sofa for the best part of a week Sam, you shouldn’t need to babysit me like that.” Steve apologised, retrieving his mug and sipping at it, the warm sweetness settling in his stomach and soothing him. He was eager to end this conversation.

*************

“Thank you Steve.” Sam responded, confusing Steve. “Thank you for trusting me enough to tell me. I guess, with the serum and everything, you don’t need to worry about getting tested. And it was such a long time ago, I’m not really sure what I can do to help you other than talk. Wait, you said 1935, right?” Steve nodded slowly. “And you were born in 1918” another nod. Sam quickly did the math in his head and a new wave of disgust and horror came over him. “oh my god, Steve. You were _17!_ You must have been terrified. I’m so sorry that happened to you man, it makes you wonder if doing the right thing is really worth it… Can I just ask, and you can say ‘no’ if you want to, but would you mind if I talked to Bucky about this? Mainly so I can get his point of view, we know how you like to suffer in silence from time to time, Mr ‘I only dislocated my shoulder, I don’t need it checked’” Steve grinned, rolling his eyes at the memory. He had been right, though, he’d put it back himself and there hadn’t been any issues.

“No, I don’t mind. He knows everything and if I say it’s okay to talk to you about it then go ahead. I haven’t slept in two days though so I’m going to go and try for a few hours and let you get some more. I’ll come running later as well. Thank you, Sam. “ Steve stood and hurried to his room before Sam could see him break down. He’d never said it out loud before and the weight it carried was more than he could ever have known. He had his hand covering his mouth in an attempt to control the violent sobs, stumbling with weak knees over to the bed. Steve was curled up hugging Bucky’s pillow when he rang, it was a hologram call this time, so they could see one another and Bucky was in no way prepared for what he saw.

“Oh Stevie.” Was all it took, Steve already felt better, Bucky was home to him and just hearing his voice halved his pain. “I’m coming home tomorrow, Stark finally finished, he just needs to re-attach it. I’m guessing you spoke to Sam?” Steve nodded, willing a tiny smile on his lips. “I’m so proud of you Steve, I know that can’t have been easy.” The small smile bloomed. “And there’s the smile I love so much.” Bucky teased, making Steve blush.

“Buck, would you sing to me, please?” Steve whispered, not trusting his voice. Bucky almost teared up, Steve hadn’t ever _asked_ Bucky to sing, he’d always just done it.

“Of course I will, Stevie. You know I will. I can’t wait to see you tomorrow, I have a surprise.” He murmured, smiling cheekily. “I’ll save that for later though. You look like you’ve not slept in a while. I love you Stevie, close your eyes.” Bucky instructed, knowing he would send Steve to sleep.

“Love you too Buck.” Steve mumbled as he did as he was told, no longer afraid of what was waiting for him. Bucky’s deep voice filtered through the speakers on the headboard, low and relaxing.

_The other night dear, as I lay sleeping_

_I dreamed I held you in my arms_

_B_ _ut when I awoke, dear, I was mistaken_

_S_ _o I hung my head and I cried._

_You are my sunshine, my only sunshine_

_You make me happy when skies are grey_

_You'll never know dear, how much I love you_

_Please don't take my sunshine away_

 

Steve was asleep in seconds.

* * *

 

“Steve, buddy, calm down. They’re only a couple hours late, according to JARVIS they’re in traffic.” Clint repeated, watching as Steve paced up and down by the elevator.

“I know, I know. I just need to see him.” Steve mumbled anxiously, his palms were sweaty and he couldn’t sit still. According to JARVIS, Tony, Nat and Bucky had all contacted him to inform him of the holiday traffic. It’s July 3rd and everyone is crossing the country to visit their families. In a way that’s exactly what Bucky was doing, only he was going home.

“Steve, everything is fine. They’ll be here soon.” Bruce said, his soft voice lulling though the noise that wouldn’t quiet in Steve’s head. In his few hours of sleep, Steve hadn’t dreamt at all. He was grateful but it unnerved him slightly, even if they were good dreams, he was used to having something during the night. Perhaps that was why he was so fidgety now.

“Captain Rogers? Mr Stark, Miss Romanov and Mr Barnes have arrived, they are on their way to this floor.” JARVIS’ monotone shattered all the worries Steve was having, many he was unable to put into words.

“You see?, everything’s fine.” Clint chirped, trying to remind himself that they’d lost each other once, they’d do whatever they could not to again. The elevator door opened to reveal Tony, Natasha and Bucky, who pushed past the other two and into Steve’s waiting arms. Bucky tucked his chin on Steve’s shoulder and breathed him in, he was home.

“I’m sorry Steve, I’ll try not to leave again.” He whispered, too low for anyone but Steve. Steve just held on tighter, finding comfort in the way Bucky reciprocated. He’s always felt better wrapped in Bucky’s hold, it was the one thing he missed about the way he was before the serum; he could get lost in a cocoon that consisted entirely of Bucky, shutting out the rest of the world, every hurt and every bully. Nothing bad could happen to him so long as he had Bucky

“How about we go and not-watch a movie while I give you an early birthday present?” Bucky suggested, lust growing with his pupils. Steve grinned and kissed the corner of his mouth teasingly, letting his tongue flick out and wet the area, blowing on it as he pulled back. However, something then dawned on him.

“Wait, Birthday? No, Buck, we’re not celebrating my birthday. I don’t even know how old I’m supposed to be, do we count my years in the ice? Or do those 70 years not count?” he complained, turning to look at the others for help. Most of them were lounging in the sofa pit, Tony already had a drink in his hand even though he’d only been back about 5 minutes. “Guys, c’mon. Tell him we aren’t celebrating, we never have before.” He pleaded, knowing that if Stark was any way involved then it was likely to be very extravagant.

"No can do, Spangles. Your boyfriend basically forced us, I mean we were likely to anyway but he did most of the planning. And I’m not ruining anything, we were going to tell you about the party as we’ve been informed you don’t like surprises.” Tony rambled, his smart mouth getting away from him as it usually did. “Don’t worry, nothing big, just a rooftop pool party with current company.” He added more gently, apparently seeing his distaste.

“Bucky? Really? I don’t need a party, we never had one before…” Steve mumbled, torn between wanting to know what his present from Bucky was and arguing against the party.

“That’s exactly why we’re having one, Stevie. And anyway, we’ve already brought everything and its partially set up, its mainly waiting for you now.” Bucky explained, dragging a pouting Steve to the elevator, a mischievous grin on his lips. “Anyway, early birthday present remember, you don’t look like you’ve slept all too well, I can help you with that.”

Steve blushed, hearing a few snickers and coughs from the others. Luckily the doors closed in time for Bucky to press him up against one wall. “I _have_ missed you, babydoll, I’m gonna make you feel so good. Just a teaser for tomorrow, it’s going to be all about you…”


	5. Fuck Me Barnes!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've had to up the chapter count again because I feel bad about not updating fast enough and realistically it didn't fit in properly. I should have the next one up within a few days, deffo by Sunday. If you're here for plot then this chapter is not really for you, there's the tiniest amount right at the very end but that's it.

“Oh god. Oh fuck! Bucky!” Steve cried out from beneath the Assassin. When Bucky had rolled the condom on he’d been confused as they’d never used one in the past and neither needed to given the serum. But he didn’t question his lover, he figured it was for a reason, now he knew what: his ass was vibrating.

Bucky had taken his time getting Steve worked up and open for him, denying Steve any opportunity to touch him and make him feel the same. Bucky just kept saying “no Stevie, tonight’s about you.” Or “Seeing and hearing you like this is pleasure for me.” It wasn’t that Steve didn’t believe him, he just loved hearing Bucky moan and whine for him the way he was for Bucky.

As soon as the elevator stopped Bucky hauled Steve’s legs around his waist and hurried to the bedroom. They were both naked in less than a minute, lips moulding to one another’s perfectly in sync, tongues mapping out the others mouths, hands trailing and scratching and gripping, hard cocks pressing and rubbing together in a hot flurry of movement.

Eventually, Bucky got needy. He brought his flesh hand down to their dicks and held the two together, rolling his hips for friction. Having not seen each other for a week this was bliss, he didn’t know about Bucky but Steve hadn’t touched himself all week, knowing that the end result would be better. Given the circumstances he wasn’t really in the mood anyway, and once Bucky knew which nightmares he was having, he wouldn’t have even tried to turn their nightly conversations into phone sex.

Steve hadn’t been wrong, the end result was perfect, albeit fast arriving (Bucky had been stroking for about a minute and Steve was gone). All his muscles tensed and his hips bucked up to match Bucky’s rhythm, come streaking up his and his lovers chest, the latter’s shortly mixing with it. Breathless moans and light chuckles lingered in the air as they calmed, Bucky letting his weight fall completely onto the Captain.

“Ew, Bucky.” Steve complained, feeling the sticky heat between them spread and begin to cool, that was the only problem with sex, the mess afterwards. Bucky just shrugged and kissed him, tangling metal fingers in barely damp hair. When he pulled away he had a darker look in his eye, one that Steve was accustomed to and simultaneously afraid of and excited about. This was the look Bucky had on his face when it was the Sargent’s turn to be Captain.

A smirk forming on his face, Bucky gently pulled Steve’s head back by his hair, he didn’t yank sharply, that’s not what this was. “Open wide” he instructed, pulling his come covered hand from between their bodies. Steve swallowed and did as he was told, trying to stifle a smile. When it was within reach, he poked his tongue out and trailed it up Bucky’s pinkie, then sucking it into his mouth and licking it clean, nipping the tip lightly. He then repeated the action with Bucky’s four other fingers, relishing the taste and ‘humm’ing in enjoyment. Buck’s eyes grew impossibly darker and he scrambled off Steve to find his discarded pants, making a quick trip to the bathroom and returning with a pack of baby wipes. As much as Steve loved the hot flannel treatment he equally loved the quick baby-wipe clean. Baby-wipes meant round 2, and the fact he brought the pack instead of pulling a few from the pack most likely meant round 3 and round 4, or as many as they could do before falling asleep.

Steve bit his lip, giving Bucky a loving and thankful look, within twenty minutes Steve had mostly forgotten the past week, everything that had happen seemed so irrelevant when Bucky was around. Returning the smile, Bucky got to work wiping their semen off Steve’s washer-board chest and perky breasts, Unlike the flannel, the baby wipes were cold and they made Steve’s skin tingle where they stroked. Bucky hurriedly wiped himself down and properly cleaned his hand before grabbing the lube. “How do you want this? Front or back?” Bucky asked casually.

“Front” Steve replied instantly, he hadn’t seen Bucky for a week, he wasn’t about to pass up an opportunity to stare at him.

“Okay.” He replied, standing by the foot of the bed and dragging Steve to meet him, so his ass was practically hovering off the edge. He then bent Steve’s knees to his chest, exposing his little pink hole. “Don’t move, Stevie, and don’t you dare come before I say so.” He warned, dropping to his knees and placing the lube and condom on the floor. “Tell me if you want to stop.” He whispered against Steve’s thigh, nipping a trail down to his premium. Steve nodded quickly, his heart picking up in anticipation. 

Bucky leaned in and pressed the flat of his tongue against Steve’s hole, feeling it twitch and pulse around him. Steve was already hard, hadn’t really softened before to be honest. Once upon a time it had been an annoyance of the serum, now it was one hell of a perk, especially with someone so willing to exhaust him. Bucky began to move his tongue in small circles, coating the rim in saliva before pressing the tip in.

Steve sighed and tried to push his hips down to get more of Bucky, but he just chuckled and pulled away. “Ah Ah Ah… Keep still, we don’t want to _ruin_ things, do we?” he growled, making Steve swallow and eagerly shake his head. Bucky was in no way lying when he said ‘ruin’. It had happened on occasion when Steve had pressed the boundaries of whatever this was (and once when there was a call to assemble at 1am), where Bucky would slick his hand with plenty of lube and stroke Steve hard and fast until he was whimpering mess, draw him close to the edge multiple times and when he finally went over he would let go and leave Steve thrusting into nothing and craving friction while his orgasm dribbled and died instead of exploded into life like it normally did.

Happy with his response, Bucky dived back in. Licking and pushing his tongue into Steve’s ass, sucking hickies around the edge, they might not last long but Steve would feel it when they fucked. Gradually, Steve got used to the feeling of Bucky’s mouth, loving it but wanting more. Thankfully. Bucky sensed this and sucked his finger into his mouth, wetting it thoroughly before pressing into Steve.

The younger moaned softly, not usually very vocal during foreplay, not unless Bucky used toys, and even then he was a bit restrained. When they got to the main event however, that’s when Steve really woke up, he would moan, whimper, sometimes scream until his throat was sore and his voice was hoarse, he would never let the team know but he actually had the mouth of a sailor. If he tried hard enough he could probably make Bucky come with his dirty talk alone.

But for now he was quiet and Bucky like to make it his personal mission to make Steve wake the other Avengers, so far no luck but he would, and he had a feeling that tonight would be the night. Feeling impatient, Bucky added another finger and began to thrust and scissor, stretching him wide. When he felt loose enough, Bucky began to tease and stroke upwards, twisting his hand and making beaconing motions with his fingers, it wasn’t hard to find what he was looking for as he’d mapped every inch of Steve’s body long ago and by this point it was almost muscle memory. When Steve’s hips bucked on their own and a stuttered moan escaped Steve’s lips he knew he’d found it.

“That’s it Stevie, let it out…” he coaxed, mercilessly stroking the gland, enjoying the way Steve writhed and moaned, like he couldn’t control it, as through Bucky was forcing it out of him. Bucky could see he was dripping, and it must be hard work for him not to be coming right now let alone touching himself, so Bucky decided to help out. He wet his metal hand with some lube and brought it to Steve’s shaft, he pressed the thumb onto the head and Steve whimpered outright. Bucky sighed with want but calmed himself, he could wait, and he knew it was going to be good when the time came.

“Fuck! Bucky! Oh my god, I’m gonna- I need-“ Steve cried out, his hips freely moving in time to both of Bucky’s movements.

“No, wait. You’ll thank me for it later, trust me.” Bucky said, removing his hand from Steve’s hot dick and single handily applying the condom, not letting up in his ass.

“I can’t- Buck, Shit! I can’t, _please?”_ Steve whined, his hands dangerously close to ripping the bedsheets and likely to burst a blood vessel if he didn’t get his release soon. Bucky quickly applied lube and stood, not yet removing his fingers.

“Almost babydoll, almost.” He promised, lining up to Steve’s hole and pressing in alongside his fingers, slowly pulling them out as he pushed deeper. He moaned long and deep, his head tipping back. Steve was gasping at this point, body coated in a layer of sweat. Bucky took hold of his ankles and held his legs wide, pushing towards the bed so he felt the stretch more.

As he began to thrust, Bucky felt what Stark had promised when handing the condom over. It started out as a light tingle but as his speed picked up the heat and friction did too, giving the nano-vibrators the energy they needed to do their job. Bucky grinned and laughed slightly, feeling the vibrations all over his shaft, surely Steve must be able to feel them inside as well.

“What the h-hell is th-that?” Steve stammered, face becoming even more strained as he tried to hold onto his orgasm.

“Vibrating condom, you can come now Stevie, I’ll allow it.” He granted his permission and within a second Steve was arching and shuddering through a powerful hands free orgasm, crying and cursing in euphoria. Bucky swore he saw a few tears leak from his eyes, he wasn’t worried though as Steve was smiling wider than he’d seen in while. Bucky had to slow his movements to make sure he didn’t blow his wad too early, and to give Steve a bit of a breather.

“Jesus Buck, where the hell did you get it?” Steve panted, his legs still trembling in Bucky’s hold. Feeling the strain, Bucky lowered Steve’s ankles and lifted him off the bed, crawling up and sitting with his back to the headboard, Steve seated in his lap. By this point the vibrations had died down, easy enough to ignore despite how achingly hard he still was.

“It was an apology present from Stark. He felt bad about what he said and, realising how dirty you were behind closed door, created something that would be mutually pleasing. As with a normal condom it’s non re-usable but if we want more then we only have to ask.” He explained, stroking Steve’s hair out from where it had falling into his eyes, it needed cutting. “You don’t mind do you?” he asked quickly, worried that Steve might be offended or disgusted.

Thankfully, Steve shook his head and let it fall to Bucky’s shoulder, grazing his teeth over his clavicle. “No, I don’t mind one bit. Thanking him will be embarrassing but I’ll get over it.” He murmured groggily, sounding half asleep. Worried he might actually nod off with Bucky still inside him, he slipped his metal hand between them and began to stroke Steve’s half hard erection, working it to its former glory. “Ah fuck. Sen-sensitive Buck, too m-much” he said into Bucky’s neck, sounding much more alert now.

“Didn’t want you falliln’ asleep babydoll, we aren’t done yet. I’m gonna keep jerkin’ you off and when you’re ready, start moving.” Bucky guided, even though it was torture feeling Steve clench and tense around him when the feeling was a little too much.

It didn’t take long for Steve to get restless, his hot breath coating Bucky’s neck, nails digging in to his flesh shoulder. He began with timid roll of his hips, dipping his toe in the water to see if it was too much. Apparently it wasn’t enough as he rolled again, lifting slightly on his knees. Bucky groaned and didn’t stop himself from lifting his hips to meet Steve.

“Fuck, Stevie. I gotta, you’re so tight, this is agony. Please Stevie.” He begged, feeling his resolve crumble, needing to make Steve his own. The blonde nodded and raised higher on his knees to give Bucky more room to work with. The latter wasted no time, snaking his free arm around Steve’s waist, Bucky began to piston his hips, moving in and out of the Captain, the vibrations quickly picking up and making both their insides burn with raging lust.

Feeling his pleasure build and make his toes curl, Bucky drew Steve’s lips to his own in nothing more than a peck, both being too high on endorphins to do much else than breath the other in. Steve was now fully hard again and Bucky just kept stroking him, thumbing over the head to collect any pre-come and make the slide easier. The top of Bucky’s thighs tingled from the slapping against Steve’s ass, and the condom was making him very sensitive.

“I love you, Stevie” Bucky breathed, slightly altering the angle so he would graze Steve’s prostate. The Captain cried out in surprise, dropping his forehead to Bucky’s “I love you too, Buck. So much.” He replied breathlessly, his face jaw slackening and brows furrowing as he came silently into Bucky’s waiting palm. It was mild in comparison to his previous orgasms but it was just as loving, and all Bucky needed to bite his lip and whimper out his own release, pulling Steve closer to him.

The pair lay catching their breath in each other’s arms, damp and sticky from sweat and come but very sated and content. Every so often they would lock lips or just press kisses to whichever body part was closest, free hands trailing up and down, raising goose-bumps.

Eventually the nice feeling wore off and the stickiness became, well… gross. Steve was the first to pull away, pulling a face at the mess between them. “C’mon Buck, let’s go clean up.” He said, sliding over Bucky, who was groaning in protest (having been almost asleep), and making his way over to the wet room. While Steve often didn’t like taking things from Stark, when he accepted the apartment he was very happy the ‘rain room’, as Bucky called it, was included. Unlike a shower head where the water would spray out of a confined area, often meaning that one person was uncovered when showering together (this happened a lot for the WWII soldiers). The wet room, however, had many holes in the ceiling and the water pressure could be altered so if you wanted a light shower, you would get droplets, if you wanted torrential downpour then you would get constant water beating down on you. The only difference was that it was warm. Steve fucking loved it.

“I wanna sleep…” Bucky drawled, his words slurring a little. Steve chuckled, waiting by the door and looking back over his shoulder.

“Are you sure? I’m guessing you don’t wanna get fucked against the wall then?” He asked indifferently, as though he didn’t care either way. Adding to his amusement, Bucky leapt from the bed and hurried past Steve into the already raining room, JARVIS knew exactly how they liked it and had it waiting by the time Steve reached the door. Steve laughed again and shut the door behind him. Tonight was gonna be tiring…

 

* * *

 

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY STE- wait, where are they? What the hell happened to the bed?” Tony exclaimed, the team tumbling in behind him with hordes of gifts in their hands. Tony was carrying a tray of food for him and Bucky to nibble at, full of waffles, pancakes, pastries and his routine bowl of Cheerios. A super-sized breakfast for the super-sized superhero-boyfriends. Natasha and Sam were behind him with Thor, Bruce and Clint behind them. The idea had been to wake the Good Captain with a nice surprise on his birthday, they’d celebrate like never before. At least they would if he was in the room.

“Captain Rogers and Sergeant Barnes are sleeping in the spare room, Sir. Shall I wake them?” JARVIS informed dutifully. Looking around the room Tony noticed various items of clothing and very rumpled sheets. He could also see the remainder of a tie poking out from behind the splintered headboard. A grin formed on his face, he was glad they’d appreciated his early gift.

“No thanks J. We’ll do it. Can you order them a new bed though, a steel one this time, not wooden…” he mumbled, backing out of the room and following the fellow avengers to the spare room.

“Certainly Sir.” JARVIS responded on automatic, J was the only thing in life he wouldn’t know what to do without, other than Pepper, and maybe the Avengers.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY STEVE!!!!” They tried again, Tony making sure to keep his eyes closed, just in case. Although Barnes knew the plan so he should have remembered to at least put underwear on. When he peaked his eye open he was greeted with the most adorable image he had ever seen; Steve leaning up on his elbows with Bucky’s arm draped over his bare waist. Both soldiers had sleep (and sex) mussed hair, Steve looked like a confused Labrador but his smile was slowly growing and understanding dawned through his sleepy haze. And Bucky was looking at Steve as though he’d hung the moon and stars personally, each one for him. “J?” he murmured quietly, waiting for someone else to disturb the picture before he did. JARVIS didn’t have to respond to know he’d done as Tony asked.


	6. Under The Fireworks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally managed to complete this. I'm happy with most of it and I cant believe it got this long for an Avengers one-shot series but there we go. Any and all mistakes are my own as I have no beta. I Hope you like it!

“Right, present time.” Bucky said around his mouthful of toast, pulling the tray off Steve’s lap (thankfully covered by sweatpants). Steve wanted to protest but he wasn’t given a choice when Clint picked up his small pile and dumped them on the Captain’s lap. As with all the beds in Stark Tower, the one in the spare room of Steve and Bucky’s floor was queen sized. Both men were large so they mostly filled the bed but when they sat up against the headboard there was plenty of room by their feet for others to sit. Natasha was sat leaning against the (taller than normal) footboard with her knees tucked close to her chest, Sam occupied the other corner with Tony sprawled out in front of them. Bruce had opted for the office chair, dragging it closer to the bed and lazily spinning it from side to side while Clint had chosen to crouch on the bedside table (how anyone could be comfortable in that position Steve didn’t know).

Sighing in defeat, Steve picked up a small box-shaped gift from the pile, rolling his eyes at the shield wrapping paper he’d used. Carefully opening the paper at the seams, Steve unwrapped his first of what looked like many gifts; the pile in his lap had about 5 others, and each teammate had their own pile. Discarding the paper, Steve turned the box over to look inside the little window, it was a little figurine of himself with a small body and a large, square-ish head. One of the captions said: ‘bobble head’ in bold letters. Steve glanced at Clint, not expecting to receive his own merch. Clint just gave him a shit eating grin and urged him to open more.

So Steve continued to open presents, looking around and noticing everyone was smiling in a way that wasn’t just happiness, it was anticipation. It was mischievous and to be honest? Steve was a little worried. A theme quickly emerged as he opened a fourth captain America related gift. Catching on to the joke, Steve grew less careful and just ripped the paper off, not caring about any mess it made.

By the time he’d finished he had a plethora of gifts related to him, including: a wrist watch, red, white and blue socks with wings, 5 t-shirts and two hoodies, USB sticks, earrings (“I can’t even pierce my ears without them healing”), figurines, underwear, a belt, cufflinks, mugs, a plastic version of his cowl, flip-flops, and something he might actually use, an apron with his uniform outlining the body.

“Okay, who’s idea was this?” Steve relented, looking at the red, white and blue pile sitting between himself and Bucky.

“Wait, did you bring mine up?” Bucky asked eagerly. Thor nodded and passed the bag over to Steve, who took it with the hope that these were serious gifts, there wasn’t that many. As he opened the first one, another box shape, he realised he was wrong. This time, the box had a mini version of Bucky with a bobble head and a silver arm.

“Really Buck? Where did you even find these? You haven’t been public long.” He pointed out, sitting it on the pile and moving to the next present. Another hoodie, with the left arm silver with a bright red star on the tricep, another wristwatch, with a red star in a silver circle, a cuddly bear with a black uniform and facemask, and of course the metal arm. Another mug, and finally a Lego figure with a silver arm and facemask, it seemed all the Winter Soldier merch was the same.

“D’you like it Stevie?” Bucky cooed, the sarcastic little shit. He was grinning from ear to ear, wearing the ridiculous shield sunglasses that did little to block the sun. “You see, we all decided to get you Captain America stuff cause we know how much you dislike PR and charity events and such, we thought it would be funny to see your reaction to some of the shit your face is on these days. But then I thought to myself: Steve likes me, and I’m the Winter Soldier, so he will freakin’ LOVE shit with my face on it!’” He explained animatedly, shaking the bear in Steve’s face.

“I _love_ you Bucky, you know that. But you shouldn’t have wasted your money, you know I’m going to donate most of this right?” he asked, directing it at the team as well.

“Um… Billionaire over here…” Tony quipped, he was wearing an Iron Man t-shirt and Steve realised that they might not all go to waste. “Steve, buying your real gifts didn’t even make a dent in my bank account, you might not realise it but we actually get paid a _lot_ as avengers, you know, service to the world and all that.” He added, reaching over and plucking one of the Cap’s uniform hoddie’s from the pile. He stood up and pulled it on, it looked nice and cosy, it was about two sizes two big but that just seemed to add to the effect. He would overheat and die if he kept it on in this weather though.

“That’s besides the point and you know it” Steve grumbled, sliding out of bed and going to the closet, he found it empty. “How did you know we were in here?” he asked, remembering they were in the spare room.

“JARVIS told us when we didn’t find you in your room…” Sam said, raising an eyebrow suggestively at Steve. The blonds face flared up, eyes widening when he realised that everyone had seen the mess.

“Bucky, come on, we need to get dressed” he said hurriedly, rushing from the room before anyone could ask questions. Bucky laughed and followed, throwing a wink back at Sam. He knew they’d all deal with the gifts, they’d probably place them around the tower to add to the joke, waiting for Steve to find where each was hidden. They’d probably all wear the clothes as well, just to annoy him.

Bucky shut the door behind him and took in the mess, too out of it last night to have noticed. “Shit Steve, that’s a fourth bed, we’re gonna need something stronger than wood this time…” he mused, walking over to where Steve was in the closet, pressing his front to Steve’s back. “Happy Birthday Stevie, those presents weren’t serious, we have got genuine gifts waiting upstairs. Aaaannnndddd I’m finally gonna make love to you under the fireworks, like we’ve always wanted.” He whispered into the blondes ear, the shiver down his spine transferring to Bucky’s chest.

“Hmmm, I’d like that. What about the party? It’s ‘rooftop’ isn’t it, I’m all for kinky, Buck, but not for public viewing.” He joked, turning his head to kiss Bucky’s nose.

“The party is technically on the balcony, the one a few floors down with a pool facing south. The original idea was rooftop but it’s a tall tower… it probably wasn’t going to be that warm up there… it’s a beautiful day though, wall to wall blue sky all day. It’s gonna be so perfect. Everything you deserve.” Bucky murmured tenderly, lightly pressing his lips to Steve’s in a chaste loving kiss. “We’d better dress though, guests will be arriving.” He said, nipping Steve’s hip and taking the navy plaid shirt out of his hands.

 

* * *

 

“Greetings everyone! Now you are all here I would like to thank you all for joining us this fine day. Happy Birthday America and Happy Birthday to its Captain. Steve, I refuse to believe this is your first party but if that is true then I hope we make this a good one for you. There is plenty of food, even enough spare for us regular humans; lookin’ at you Thor-eal. The grill will be lit shortly, don’t swim straight after eating, wait at least 20 minutes, vomit is horrible to clean from a pool. Before the festivities begin, everybody ready?!” Tony called from the table he was stood on. Attention was quickly diverted back to Steve however as the group (consisting of Tony, Sam, Bucky, Nat, Clint, Bruce, Pepper, Jane, Darcy, Thor and Rhodey, even Fury and Coulson had shown) erupted in a chorus of ‘happy birthday’.

Steve stood awkwardly with Bucky’s strong arm around his waist, shuffling his feet and giving Tony a defeated glare. He couldn’t help feeling grateful though, he didn’t know how easy it had been to organise this but he suspected it wasn’t very. And he’d been given some wonderful presents as well: new art supplies from Pepper, an acoustic guitar from Bruce (he’d mentioned he used to play once), Sam got him a new running kit (thankfully not Captain America themed), Thor had gifted him with a huge barrel of Asgardian liquor that carried on getting better with age, he unwrapped multiple avengers themed thongs and swim trunks (again, not of himself) from Darcy and Jane, Tony, Clint and Natasha had teamed up to get him a matt black classic motorcycle with two helmets and two sets of leathers so he and Bucky could go for long rides.

He felt bad for picking but his gift from Bucky was by far the best. It was a simple leather bound photo album that had pictures ranging from when they were children (they were technically drawings) all the way up until this morning, with Steve and Bucky looking like they’d just woken up. “Some of these are courtesy of JARVIS, Tony managed to snap this one this morning when they woke us.” Bucky told him later on, as he was taking a quiet five minutes to look through them all.

Just after three Tony meandered over towards Steve, Standing beside him and watching everyone enjoy themselves. He handed over a glass of champagne and a plain white box about an inch deep and two inches long. “Extra present.” He said with a grin, halting Steve’s hand when he attempted to open it. “I wouldn’t open it in public.” He explained cryptically.

Steve raised an eyebrow and tucked it into the back pocket of his shorts. Tony clinked their glasses and took a sip, bouncing slightly on his toes. He was clearly wanting to say something but wasn’t sure if he should. “What is it Tony, I can tell you want to talk.” Steve prompted, turning to look at him directly.

“Did you have fun last night?” Tony blurted, earning a surprised laugh off the soldier. “I need to know if I have to take that box back…” He added sheepishly, anxiously nibbling on his lower lip while he waited for Steve to answer.

Oddly not embarrassed, Steve put a hand on Tony’s shoulder and leaned in beside his ear. “It was the best sex I’ve had so far.” He whispered hotly, pulling back and seeing a wide eyed Tony. “Seriously though, thank you. Or apology accepted, or whatever, just know that it wasn’t your fault, something happened when I was a teenager and what you said kinda triggered a memory…” he half explained, not willing to reveal everything. But having told Sam he felt more comfortable telling someone else, his chest felt a tiny but lighter.

He hadn’t expected the conversation to continue but then it was Tony, so he should have known really. “How old were you…?” Tony asked carefully, his tone suggesting that he understood, that he knew. Sam had been trained to pick up on certain hints and to read between the lines and for that Steve was grateful. But Tony was socially inept, Steve didn’t think he’d have been able to connect the dots.

His heart was hammering and he could feel his palms get sweaty but he knew he could trust Tony; he was a team mate. “17” he stated simply, not giving anything away. He didn’t meet Tony’s eyes however, didn’t look up from his drink to see if the genius had figured it out. The next thing he knew, Sam was grasping his shoulder to get his attention.

“Hey old man, Are you alright? You’re looking way too down for your own birthday. Do I need to lecture Tony again?” he said lightly, concern lacing his words. He looked up and shook his head, choosing to ignore the ‘again’. Across the balcony, Steve saw Tony approach Bucky and lean up to speak in his ear.

“Sorry, its nothing. And I’m not old, strictly speaking I’m only 30,” Steve objected, seeing that Sam clearly didn’t buy his shrugging off but decided not to ask questions anyway. Sometimes Steve could kiss him.

“No you aren’t, I counted. You, Mr, are 97.” He said, prodding Steve’s shoulder teasingly.

“Really? You’re counting my years in suspended animation? You’re just jealous cause I’m still so good looking.” Steve countered, lazily gesturing at himself. Sam laughed and Steve relaxed, allowing himself to be pulled by Darcy and Pepper to dance. He felt very awkward doing so but the two were pulling and spinning him, it was fun despite being so out of time and awkward.

Gradually the afternoon turned to evening and Steve soon found himself becoming a little overwhelmed. Bucky noticed this and was at his side in an instant, “you wanna go to the roof now? I’ve got a cute little set up and everything, music, candles, blankets, a mattress… Also, I think there may be a few people here who would like to escape he fireworks.” Bucky looked pointedly at Tony, who was using both hands to hold his drink and looking a little wired. Steve nodded and quickly kissed him, dumping his drink on the table and grabbing Thor.

“Hey, you think you can get everyone’s attention?” he asked, hopping up onto the table tony used at the start of the day. Thor nodded eagerly and brought his hands to his mouth.

“HERE YE! HERE YEE!” He bellowed, successfully getting everyone’s very confused attention.

“Really Thunderbird, ‘here ye’?” Tony asked sceptically, noticing Steve was waiting.

“It is a form of gathering attention is it not?” Thor questioned, Tony could see he knew full well where the term came from but it was always fun to confuse his fellow Avengers. “Steven wishes to make a speech!” he said louder, causing the small gathering to cheer enthusiastically.

“It’s not a- I was just-“ Steve tried before sighing in defeat, “I was just going to say that Bucky and I will now be leaving to the roof. Ever since we met we always watched the 4th of July fireworks together, I also used to believe him when they said they were especially for me…” Everyone but Bucky ‘awwed’. “It became tradition to just sit and watch them, just us two, no matter what we’d done with family and friends during the day. Now I don’t know about him but I’d like to keep up that tradition. So mainly I wanted to thank everyone. I know most of you will be around tomorrow but I wanted to thank you all as one. As my first party, and yes it really was my first, I had a great time. Until I was deliberately told yesterday I genuinely had no idea any of this was happening so well done for keeping that without me getting suspicious. And thank you all for the wonderful gifts, I can’t describe how much it means to be able to see how much you’ve put thought into it. I’m not drunk but I can’t seem to stop talking, so thank you all again and we’ll see you tomorrow, or soon after… Goodnight, enjoy the fireworks!” Steve nodded and climbed down, somehow managing to avoid various goodbye’s on his way indoors with Bucky’s hand in his.

“Lovely speech Captain but you took your time. We’re going to have to make up time if we plan to fuck under the fireworks.” Bucky deadpanned, crowding him into the corner of the elevator as soon as the doors closed.

“Oh so we’re ‘fucking’ now are we?” Steve asked in a deep voice, allowing his arm to pull Bucky close and his hand to slide under the waistband of his boxers, cupping his ass.

“No, we’re still having super slow and beautiful and intense and quiet sex but the alliteration was too good to pass up.” Bucky spoke into Steve’s mouth, pausing every other word to nip his lower lip.

Steve chuckled, grazing his nails over the soft toned flesh of Bucky’s cheek, using it to pull their hips close and rub up against each other. The brunette growled and backed out of the elevator with his lover in tow, his heart filling with joy when he saw the others expression.

“Buck…” Steve breathed, pulling away so he could get a better look at the little set up on the roof. While there were lights that could be used, Bucky hadn’t bothered. Instead there were at least a hundred candles dotted around, some in small clusters others on their own. Many were on one side of the ‘mattress’, providing a beautiful glow and a warmth Steve could feel from where they stood. When Bucky had said mattress Steve had expected a mattress from one of the beds hauled up and laid on the floor. Instead there was a large rug covering the stones, on the rug was layer upon layer of comforter and blanket, creating what looked like a very soft and cosy makeshift bed. Off to one side there was a little table with a bottle of whiskey and two glasses, Bucky knew Steve didn’t really enjoy wine or champagne. There was also an old fashioned (well, not for them) gramophone playing music Steve didn’t recognise, but it was beautiful.

“You know, Steve, I did day ‘teaser’ yesterday.” Bucky reminded him, coming to stand in front of him, holding his hand out to the side and wrapping his metal arm around Steve’s ridiculously skinny waist. Steve sighed and began to shake his head when Bucky started swaying. “I don’t care what you want Stevie, we’re dancing whether you like it or not. You’re too big to stand on my feet now but you know how to step from side-to-side right?” he teased lightly, using the arm to control Steve’s hips, tucking his face to the side of Steve’s.

“Yes I do, all those lessons in our apartment really paid off.” Steve replied in the same amused tone, pressing his lips to Bucky’s jaw.

“They really did, you’re doing really well.” He said quietly, slotting his leg between Steve’s as they danced. “I hate to kill the mood but there’s something you need to know.” He began tentatively, automatically tightening his hold of Steve.

“Go on…” Steve swallowed, thinking he knew where this was headed.

“Tony knows about what happened when you were 17… he came up out of the blue and just asked outright, it took me by surprise and I didn’t do a good job of lying, I’m sorry Steve. Tony’s probably the last person you wanted in the loop.” He said sadly, pulling back so he could see Steve’s reaction.

“Don’t worry Bucky, it wasn’t you, he already figured it out. He gave me a box of those condoms and I felt the need to explain slightly. It wasn’t his fault it panicked so I told him it triggered a bad memory, he asked how old I was and then walked away. Believe it or not I trust Tony with this, he won’t tell anyone other than maybe Pepper, but she knows when to get involved. Maybe it’s time I told the team, showing them something other than what they read in history books…” Steve rambled, Bucky was the only thing keeping him from sinking.

“Are you sure?” Bucky asked, really shocked by what Steve revealed, he was never one for talking as it was, Sam must have done a good job.

“Yeah Buck, probably not any time soon but at some point yes.” He decided, spinning him and Bucky in a small circle.

“That’s really great Stevie, you don’t know how proud of you I am.” Bucky praised, leaning in and pressing his lips to Steve’s, closing his eyes and tilting his head.

The danced and kissed like that for a little while, just the mingling of lips, tracing tongues and nibbling softly, swaying in the sunset, warmed by the vanilla scented candles. Eventually the kiss grew more heated and hands began to roam. Bucky’s slipping past the waistband of Steve’s shorts and tracing between his cheeks. Steve’s hand moved up behind Bucky’s neck, fingers tangling in the hair and pulling downward, exposing his neck for Steve to lavish over.

One slow swaying step at a time, Bucky drew them slowly to the pit of blankets, only pulling away to lower himself back, not fully trusting that it would be soft enough just to fall on. Steve quickly joined him, one leg slotted between Bucky’s as it had been when dancing. They didn’t wait any longer to resume touching and kissing, cool hands pushing clothes away and making the other shiver. Tongues and teeth leaving trails all over, temporary bruises that lived on in memory.

When he got down to Steve’s shorts, the little box of condoms fell out as he tugged them from his hips. “You want these tonight?” Bucky asked, chucking them to one side when Steve shook his head. “Good, I have something even better.” He boasted, pressing kitten kisses down Steve’s sternum and across his stomach. Steve’s breath stuttered, eyes never leaving Bucky’s as his lips reached his shining head, his soft pink tongue flicking out to lick over the slit.

Steve sighed shakily, his hips twitching with need. Bucky took the hint and wrapped his lips around Steve’s arousal. Starting with the tip, Bucky took him deeper and deeper, his tongue working magic into the underside. After taking a deep breath, the brunette sucked Steve down to the hilt, swallowing around him comfortably after months of practice. Steve gasped and whimpered, feeling his orgasm build quickly. He tapped Bucky’s shoulder to warn him, to allow him either to back up or pull away completely. Instead, Bucky just reached between his legs to press against his premium, somewhere Steve’s always been sensitive.

One hand in Bucky’s hair and the other fisted between his teeth, Steve came for the first time that evening. His moans were muffled by his fist and he was desperately trying to keep his hips still so as not to hurt Bucky, with little luck. Thankfully Bucky was used to it and moved accordingly, slowly pulling away with hollowed cheeks after his orgasm subsided. Steve breathed out a little laugh, pulling Bucky up by his hair and kissing him hard. He could taste his seed on his lovers tongue, rolling them so he hovered above.

Gazing down at Bucky, Steve grabbed the lube bottle and squirted some into his palm, taking Bucky’s hot shaft in his grasp and beginning a steady rhythm. Ordinarily Steve would also use his mouth but Bucky preferred giving than receiving when it came to blow-jobs. That and it would be quicker when Bucky decided he wanted to move onto the main event.

“Pass me the lube.” Bucky rasped, his voice hoarse from taking Steve so deep. Steve obliged and handed it over, attaching his mouth to Bucky’s perky nipples, nipping and flicking them, sucking them hard and twisting with his teeth. If there’s one thing Bucky really loved it was having his nipples played with, it drove him mad and made his squirm under Steve’s touch.

Trying to concentrate, Bucky lifted Steve higher on his knees, spreading his legs apart so he could reach better. He then lubed up his metal hand and began to stoke Steve’s entrance. The blonde raised up to glance down at Bucky, regretting it as soon as he saw the smirk and evil glint in his eyes. “So I may have lied to you a little about why my arm took longer. This is the surprise I was telling you about by the way. Stark didn’t just have to take off the forearm and fiddle with the wires…” As he spoke, Bucky worked two fingers into Steve, twisting and stretching him open. “He completely replaced it, by my request, with an added feature.” He smirked, gasping a little as Steve continued to stroke him. “Wanna know what it was babydoll? It’s gonna make you whimper and moan and beg me to let you come…” Bucky drawled, pressing open-mouthed kisses across Steve’s strong jawline.

“God Buck, if it’s what I think it is I swear to god.” Steve breathed, lowering his head to Bucky’s shoulder. Unfortunately it was what he’d suspected, although the sensations were magnificent. Vibrations assaulted Steve’s ass and Bucky chucked, knowing how much of a slut Steve was for anything that vibrated. Then, in a way that human hands can’t achieve, Bucky began to swirl his fingers round, each brushing over his prostate every rotation. Steve collapsed against Bucky, panting hard and rocking his hips back against the metal. This cause their matched cocks to brush up against one another, Steve having long let go in order to support himself. The pair moaned in sync and the vibrations got more intense, so much so that Bucky could feel it through Steve and against his own prick.

Absently, Steve heard a small pop far away, followed by a few others, and he realised that it was now a lot darker than before. So the fireworks had started and Bucky was not yet inside him. As much as he loved the feeling of the vibrating hand, nothing could compare to the skin on skin feel of your lover sliding in and out of you.

“Bucky, fireworks.” Steve managed to mumble, lifting off of the prosthetic and reaching down to line Bucky up. Being on top whilst bottoming was something Steve didn’t do very often, and not because he didn’t like it either. Sort’a by accident, riding Bucky became something reserved for special occasions. (The night before was kind of an anomaly but they figured they hadn’t seen each other in a while so…) In the 30’s, before the serum and the war, Bucky had always bottomed because he was scared he would hurt Steve accidentally, no matter how many times the tiny asthmatic claimed he would be fine. But then, on Steve’s 21’st birthday, Bucky finally relented; but only if Bucky was underneath, so there was no possibility of accidental crushing, or Bucky getting carried away. It was all under Steve’s control: the pace, the roughness, everything. Naturally, Steve loved it like he thought he would, and after seeing that he was okay Bucky grew more comfortable and began topping from above. Not that Steve cared, Bucky felt amazing and was always so gentle.

“I got you Stevie.” Bucky whispered, both hands resting on Steve’s hips, slowly pulling him down until he was sitting on Bucky’s thighs. “Fuck, you’re always so tight, this is ridiculous, thank god for your serum Steve, I don’t know how long I’m gonna last like this…” Bucky rambled, his hands automatically clutching tighter.

“Maybe if you weren’t so big…” Steve teased, leaning back with his hands on Bucky’s thighs. He knew the Soldier liked the view; head tipped back in ecstasy, large expanse of muscle rippling under flushed skin, proud dick standing tall and slapping against his stomach every time he thrust.

“You love it.” Bucky retaliated, running his hands up and down Steve’s inner thigh as the Captain began to move, starting by rolling his hips back and forth before raising higher on his knees and dropping back down again. Above them fireworks started to paint the sky with reds, whites, blues, pinks, oranges and just about every other colour you could name.

The image it crated for Bucky was astounding, and he wished he could take pictures with his eyes as no camera would ever provide a sufficient image. The colours reflected off of Steve’s shoulders and some shone through his golden hair, The blues in the sky made the blue of his eyes stand out where as the reds and whites highlighted the flush of his skin. Bucky had never seen anything so perfect in his life.

It was the same for Steve, looking down at his partner he could see every firework go off in his dilated pupils. The colours danced over his chest and made interesting shadows that accentuated his best features. Even with the sound of explosions above them they could hear the others moans clearly, the slight whimpers and breathy groans every thrust. At this point Bucky was thrusting up to meet Steve on the way down, driving in to the hilt each time, filling Steve completely in a perfect fit, like they were made for each other.

Before long, however, Steve could feel another orgasm building, untouched yet again. Sometimes he wandered if he’d trained himself to be able to come just from Bucky inside him but then he realised it was probably because Bucky knew his body so well and knew just how to get him close.

“Steve, are you-?”

“Yeah Buck, I’m close, really fucking clo- oh god.”

Bucky returned his hands to Steve’s hips to still his movements, holding him up and arching his hips up whilst slightly pushing Steve back. The combination was lethal an Steve was coming within a matter of seconds. His jaw dropped and his eyes closed as is seed sprayed all over Bucky’s chest, a silent moan ripping its way through him as he shuddered continually. His twitching and clenching tipped Bucky over, burying himself deep into the Captain as he mimicked the silent moan, allowing his hips to buck on their own accord while he released part of himself inside Steve.

After a couple of minutes of panting and shuddering, Steve pulled away and collapsed to Bucky’s side, fireworks still going off high in the clear night sky. Bucky blindly reached for the baby wipes he’d brought up, knowing cum would probably dry quicker outside. He first wiped his chest and softened cock clean before moving onto Steve, gently wiping down what had spilled out, knowing how much Steve liked the feel of him. “Okay, _that_ was the best sex I’ve had yet…” Steve drawled drowsily, slinging and arm and a leg over Bucky as he snuggled closer. The comment confused Bucky slightly but he figured it was best not to ask right now and just accept the compliment. Before getting completely comfy, he quickly grabbed a blanket and slung it over their lower halves, not wanting to feel cold in the morning.

“Um, Thank you? I guess. I hope you enjoyed today Stevie.” Bucky said as he lay down next to his lover.

“Yeah, I did Buck. I really did. Thank you so much.” Steve replied, sounding more awake than before, bright blue eyes now open and focused.

“Anything for you Steve, you know that. I have no idea how I’m gonna top it next year though, maybe we should make a bucket list, or two. One for sex things, like this and maybe delving into restraints and such, I know how hard that makes you come. But the other can be regular things, like seeing the Grand Canyon, going to Paris and climbing the Eiffel tower, getting married…” Bucky trailed off and opened the small compartment in his hand (another request) that could hold small objects. He tipped out the contents and held it between his thumb and forefinger, bright fireworks glinting of the silver band. “How about it Stevie? Will you marry me?”

Steve gasped and his vision became blurry as tears filled his eyes. “Bucky, I- how? Yes! Yes of course I will, I love you so much I can’t even put it into words. I’ll marry you, I’ll marry you, yes’ yes, yes!” Steve repeated, leaning up on his elbow to hold out his left hand, allowing Bucky to slide the ring perfectly in place on his fourth finger. He let out a laugh and leaned in to kiss Bucky ever so softly, sniffling away his happy tears. “You make me the happiest man alive Bucky Barnes, I lost you once and I will never, _ever_ lose you again. I promise to make you the second happiest man alive, after me.” Steve vowed, settling down to Bucky’s side again, unable to calm the smile on his face.

Bucky looked over and smiled softly, “You already did.” He whispered, snuggling close and taking hold of Steve’s left hand, thumb tracing over the simple silver band with blue and red crystals woven into a star.

They fell asleep like that, happy, content and so completely in love with the other.

 

The End.


End file.
